


Your number 1 fan

by jonginniesprout



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Assistant Kyungsoo, Feelings Realization, Idiots in Love, Idol Kim Jongin | Kai, KaiSoo - Freeform, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-05
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2020-11-24 11:21:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 24,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20906831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jonginniesprout/pseuds/jonginniesprout
Summary: A love between an idol and his assistant that is hidden behind the stage.





	1. Chapter 1

The audience roars loud together with resounding fan chants and unremitting hand claps as the curtain closed. Another concert successfully done by the young idol.

"Great job, Kai." His manager, Junmyeon, praises and approaches him as he enters the backstage. The make-up artists hurriedly abet him and wipes the droplets of sweat visible on his face and handed him a box of tissue.

"Thank you, everyone." He bows down and gives the staff, directors and the people around him inside his dressing room a sincere smile, their hard work for one week has finally paid off and they all deserve the best vacation after the 5-day long concert.

"Water?" A man with low and dark voice behind him questions as he taps Jongin’s shoulder with a bottle of water to which the idol reached eagerly and replied, "Thank you, Soo." 

Kim Jongin, with stage name Kai, is a 25-year-old idol who has made a big impact into the K-pop Industry by his flawless (close to perfection) dance moves and his sweet honey vocals. His physique has a perfect proportion, his long legs matches well with his toned upper body, his whole being was of quintessential type, not to mention his golden-brown complexion. The man's face was molded by god perfectly, his sharp jawlines adds sexiness to his accent. His almond brown eyes and protruding pouty lips both to which were irresistible, not to mention his boopable nose, a very dangerous combination of cute and sexy. 

Meanwhile, Doh Kyungsoo, his personal assistant _slash _best friend _slash_ his, uhhh, someone he wants to be with all the time? It's unlabelled, like they say, what you see is what you get. Kyungsoo was working for Jongin for two years now, probably the longest out of all people who previously worked for him since he has this rough attitude. He's smug, he's whiny and pure sassy but when he met Kyungsoo, his ascertain he has found his match. His assistant is smaller than him albeit a year older, he has milky smooth skin which Jongin loves to touch, his face incorporates puffy cheeks and crescent eyes which matches well with his full, heart-shaped lips. But his main asset is hidden underneath his pants, which Jongin knows so well, it's the idol's favourite part, the one he touches or squeeze every time he got a chance, it's his assistant's jutted butt. 

Kyungsoo already made his point that he has too many things on his plate already to deal with Jongin's whine from time to time and that made the idol admire his assistant in the long run, as a friend, maybe. More than that? They are still in denial and _too_ _busy_ to talk about whatever is in between them, perhaps next time. Perhaps never. 

“You did well back there.” Kyungsoo mutters while helping Jongin to remove his clothes so he can change to a more comfortable one. For his finale, Jongin wore a pair of white long sleeves polo and white pants. The sides of the polo were asymmetrical, right part has full length while the left has only half-length so it shows a small spot of his abs since he was not wearing any under shirts. There are two buttons connecting the polo to still make him look both decent but sexy at the same time. 

“You know I always do my best every performance. I really appreciate compliments coming from you.” Jongin smiles warmly back at him and caresses Kyungsoo’s shoulder. His assistant flinched and stepped back, staring at the idol with bewildered face. “Jongin, someone might see us.”

“What’s wrong with appreciating my assistant?” The idol defended as he winks back at Kyungsoo.

“Wow, acting all tough when, in fact, you’re even more worried than me if anyone would know abou--”

“About what?” A familiar voice interrupts Kyungsoo and walked towards them, approaching Jongin and handing him his bag. 

“None of your business, Junmyeon.” Jongin answers back as he reaches for his bag. 

“Whatever it is you two are talking about, make sure it won’t ruin anything I’ve worked hard for.” The manager warns before he saunters away from them. “Do you need a driver or Kyungsoo is going to drive for you?” Junmyeon asked as he peeks his head from the dressing room’s door.

“I’ll drive for him.” Kyungsoo answers while showing the manager the keys on his hand. Junmyeon nodded and closed the door, leaving the two of them to finish packing Jongin’s luggage.

"So where are we going this time?" Kyungsoo mumbles as he alights from the driver’s seat of the fully tinted black van. He reaches for Jongin's luggage first, placing it beside him and then assists the idol as he steps out of the vehicle.

"I'm too exhausted to travel now, I think I'll just stay home this week. The practice will start next weekend so I have enough time to rest." Jongin replied while taking one of the bags from Kyungsoo’s hand. They walk side by side as they enter the building of Jongin's unit. "Sounds like a plan to me." Kyungsoo replied as he presses the elevator button going to 12th floor. 

They reached Unit 1214, Jongin's pad. The idol taps his card key and opens the door, letting Kyungsoo, who's holding two luggage on his hand, to enter first. "You mean you're… you're staying with me?" Jongin sputters, his cheeks started to blush. "Well since you're on vacation, that means it's my off too, right?" His assistant replied as he settles the luggage inside the room. 

Jongin’s unit is contemporary elegant with dark finishes such as wood grain laminates, textured wallcoverings on the walls, giving it a sophisticated look. The furniture and accessories are in neutral shades of tale and beige, making a balance between dark and light. The living room has a huge off-white couch with white and black throw pillows, little bear embroidered on one corner of each pillows. Jongin’s addiction with bear characters is obvious as he makes sure every part of the house has a ‘bear touch’. A center table placed in front of the couch and a 75-inches flat screen television hanging on the wall in front of it with two tall speakers on each side, a part of his home theater. 

His dining area is composed of 6-seater dining table on the centre and a mini bartender station on the side with a few wine glasses hanging up-side down. A cabinet with glass sliding door filled with liquors and a few bear stuffed toys is placed behind the bar.

There’s a small corridor separating the master’s bedroom from the rest of the pad, which has floating shelves with an abstract geometric design, displaying the idol’s awards that he got throughout his career and his collection of bear figurines. 

The master’s bedroom is his favourite part, of course. It is simple but with elegant features. A California king bed perfectly placed behind the dark wood panel, soft, brown and bear-designed rug is placed beneath the bed. The right corner of his room has a brown polished cabinet where he placed his clothes that he uses daily, while the left side has two doors, one is the comfort room and one is his walk-in closet. The ‘bear touch’ is pretty obvious in this room since there’s a gigantic brown bear sitting beside the bed that can be used as his personal couch. He calls it his _ stress mattress. _

Kyungsoo has access to almost all of Jongin's property, his house, car, even his credit cards and bank accounts, Jongin gave him full authorization from all of it. He doesn't treat Kyungsoo as his assistant, he is his best friend and he is special to him. He loves Kyungsoo and he knows he loves him back but it's just too difficult to label it for now. Jongin is on the peak of his career, any scandal that would arise may affect his status as the _ Idol of all idols _. He worked hard for it since his teenage years, 5 years of training, hard work and all these crazy diet and exercise just to maintain his godly features, he can't back out now. His feelings for Kyungsoo can wait, he assumes, as long as their contract is valid, Kyungsoo has no choice but to be stuck beside him. 

Jongin takes his warm bath that night, he deserves every bit of it after almost a week long concert in Seoul. As he exits the shower room, Kyungsoo immediately enters with a bath towel on his arms. "Are you going to sleep here tonight?" Jongin coos and Kyungsoo nodded in reply as he beams a soft smile to the young idol. 

A few minutes after and the sound of flowing water from the shower had stopped. "Are you hungry? I can prepare something for you." Kyungsoo asked as he stepped out of the bathroom while drying his damp hair with a towel.

"Let's just order pizza, I know you're tired too." Jongin replied. Kyungsoo smiled at him sincerely as he slowly approached the California king bed Jongin was sitting on and settles beside him. "Chicken and pizza then." Kyungsoo mutters as he pinches Jongin's nose, they giggled. 

Though they were both worn out that day, they didn't get to sleep early. It's been months since they had this kind of alone time and they missed it a lot. They decided to scroll over Netflix and stayed in Jongin's room even if the television in the living room is way bigger than the one's inside Jongin's. It's just that they feel more comfortable there, in their own private place, resting side by side. Kyungsoo's chin reposing on Jongin's broad chest as he browsed over the new series on Netflix while Jongin's leg was over Kyungsoo's as he orders their food on his phone. 

They paused on the second episode of _ Money Heist _ when they heard the doorbell rang. Kyungsoo ran towards the door to get the food and pays for it. He then places it on the dining table and calls for the younger. 

"Food's here Nini, let's eat." _Nini_ is his pet name for the idol and Jongin loves it every time he hears it from the older man's lips. It just sounds perfect coming from him. "Wait, I'm coming." Jongin replies. 

It took Jongin a few minutes before he finally comes out from his room. "Thought you were hungry? I heard your stomach growls earlier." Kyungsoo deadpans and Jongin just rolled his eyes on him. He was hiding a box behind his back but he sucks at surprises so Kyungsoo noticed it, he gave the idol a perplexed look. "What's that?"

"It's.. uh… for you." Jongin placed the box on the table and slowly pushes it towards Kyungsoo, the other man reaches out and check what was inside the box.

"A watch?" Kyungsoo sputters while checking the most expensive thing he had ever held his entire life. "A _ Rolex _ watch? Why? You don't have to-" 

"Happy Anniversary." Jongin interrupts, _ 'to us' _ he wants to add, but, maybe not now. "You're working for me for two years now, you deserve that. Next time I'll give you a _ Patek _ _ Philippe _ one." He jokes. Kyungsoo gave him a quizzical look for a moment and then returns his eyes on the Rolex Air-King on his hand. He leans closer to Jongin and envelops him into a tight and warm hug which Jongin gladly returns. 

"Thank you, Nini." He whispers. Kyungsoo tiptoes and hold unto Jongin's shoulder for balance as he placed a soft kiss on his lips. "Can you put this on me?" He questions while he hands over the watch to him and Jongin obeys him eagerly. 

They cleaned up the box of chicken and pizza and other messes on the dining table before they settle back to bed. Jongin knows Kyungsoo is a neat type of person and doesn't want any single dirt left especially in the kitchen area, that's Kyungsoo's kingdom. When they're together, Jongin is not a boss, and Kyungsoo is not an assistant. 

"You shouldn't bother buying that Nini, it's too expensive." Kyungsoo's voice vibrates on his chest where Jongin's right cheek was settled. "But I want to, please don't stop me from buying things for you, it's the only way I can pay you back with everything you've done for me." He pulls up his head a little so he could see Kyungsoo's face and reaction. 

"I'm doing everything for you because it's my job." Kyungsoo brushes a few strands of hair from Jongin's face and tucks them behind his ear. 

"But what about this? You staying with me? This is not a part of your job."

"Well I'm doing this because I love-" Jongin leans down for a kiss, interrupting him, soft and languid as he brushed his lips on Kyungsoo's. "Save it later, hyung." He pulls for a while just so he could reply before he indulged again on the full of Kyungsoo's lips. 

The kiss deepens, needy and sloppy accompanied with breathy moans as they try to gasp for air in between. Kyungsoo rolls over Jongin, his arms locking the younger down between him and the mattress while their lips are still intact and locked, smacking sound of wet kisses surrounds the room. With this distance, or the lack thereof, between them, their semi-hard groins rubs against each other and Jongin felt shiver throughout his body. 

Kyungsoo slowly crawled towards south and pulls Jongin's short down together with his briefs in one go, throwing it somewhere beside the bed. He quickly returns to Jongin's parted lips, nipping on the bottom part, Jongin whimpers. Their tongue perfectly playing and fitting with each other’s mouth. 

Kyungsoo's full lips gently travelled downwards going to Jongin's chest, nibbling on Jongin's perked nipples, his tongue playfully licks and leisurely changes from left to right nipples which makes the younger's breath hitched. Jongin's erection twitching below Kyungsoo's abdomen and the older noticed it as he gives Jongin a devious smirk. His hand slowly found its way to Jongin's shaft and teasingly rubs it up and down, white drops of sticky liquid of precum already dripping from the slit of his cock. Kyungsoo squirms down and hungrily licks the trails of hair on Jongin's toned abdomen leading down to his puckered rim, his eyes closed in bliss. 

"Kyungsoo.." the younger purrs as he moaned under his breath, his hand grabbing Kyungsoo's soft and black hair. Kyungsoo's tongue drawing circles around Jongin's hole, licking around it while his finger traces the sides of Jongin's ass cheeks, getting a hiss from the younger. 

"Fuck Soo, I'm close." Jongin splutters as he pushes Kyungsoo off of him. His assistant still has his boxers on, but his erection is already bulging underneath. Jongin hurriedly pulls the piece of cloth that's stopping them to continue the pleasure and messily dodges it on the side, hitting the floor. Jongin moves a bit to reach for the small cabinet beside his bed and pulls a bottle of lube which Kyungsoo gently takes from him. He slowly lays Jongin back on the bed. Kyungsoo sits down on Jongin’s thigh while spreading the liquid unto his fingers.

Kyungsoo runs his fingers down Jongin's hole, caressing it and drawing teasing circles around it, Jongin's breath hitches as he slowly lifts his ass, a low frustrated moan comes out from his lips. "Hyung, please." he whines, staring at Kyungsoo who's eyes were dark and full of lust. 

"Did you prepare yourself already, Nini?" Kyungsoo asks, circling Jongin's hole with infuriating slowness.

"Y.. yes-- Fuck," Jongin sucks under his breath when Kyungsoo presses one finger in. 

Jongin wraps his legs around Kyungsoo's waist, heels of his feet digging into Kyungsoo's back, asking to give him more than just his fingers. "Please, Soo." Kyungsoo obliges on the desperate appeal of the young idol as he slides his second finger inside his rim, scissoring and stretching Jongin open. His other hand massaging Jongin's thigh before he spread Jongin's ass cheeks. Jongin's toes curl and his breath hitches. 

"Please-- I want," Jongin’s words were cut off when Kyungsoo aligns himself above him, spreading and sliding in between Jongin's ass, he felt a soft friction beneath them, Kyungsoo’s bulging head smearing with pre-cum trapped inside his velvet rim, a strangled moan escaping him.

Kyungsoo shifts to press their noses together, but it jostles them, his dick brushing directly at Jongin's prostate, making Jongin suck in his breath. 

"More of that-- Hyung," Jongin purrs with a breathy moan. 

Kyungsoo buries his face under Jongin's neck as he starts to thrust, slowly until Jongin scratches his nails into Kyungsoo's back. He sets a rhythm, his hips thumping against Jongin's ass, skin slapping against skin, a jostle of pleasure combined by the wetness of Kyungsoo's tongue and mouth on Jongin's sensitive neck. Jongin's cock already leaking with precum, hot against his feverish skin, and the breeze of the air condition that blows inside his room made him quiver and shrink until Kyungsoo envelops him. Jongin clings unto Kyungsoo's neck, then he slowly moves his hands up to brush his fingers as he grabs a handful of Kyungsoo's hair. Kyungsoo's lips met his and they kiss, languid and luscious and wet, just like his thrusts. 

Kyungsoo shifts his angle to better his leverage, the tilted movement of his hips are enough to set off Jongin's orgasm. Jongin whimpers, fingers curling into a fist, as he hides his face in the heat of Kyungsoo's neck, but the older straights up and pushes Jongin to fall back on the bed, lips parted as he comes inside Jongin's hole. 

Kyungsoo scoots down beside Jongin after pulling his still erected member from him, his head resting above Jongin's warm and sweaty chest while his legs entwined with Jongin's. "I love you, Nini." His voice was soft as a whisper. 

"I lo--, you know I can't love you yet, hyung.." Jongin half-heartedly replied with a downcast gaze.

They have loved each other since Kyungsoo's sixth month on his job. Their everyday bickering about both everything and nothing becomes a habitual act between the two of them, they haven't noticed that they've both swept off by their feet by just teasing each other until they fell in love. 

With Jongin's current status as an idol, love and relationship is his least priority and Kyungsoo understands it perfectly. As long as they are together every day, it's more than enough even if showing affection to each other are concealed to the four corners of Jongin's unit. Stolen glances, hugs, ass tapping, yes it makes their relationship more exciting. But what are they, really? More than friends, less than lovers? 

A continual buzz of the doorbell woke Kyungsoo up at an ungodly hour. He flinches and pull himself in a sitting position while waking Jongin up. No one should know that he stayed the night there, especially when they are both naked all throughout. 

"Nini, the door." He whispers as he gently shakes Jongin, trying to get him into his senses. "You go get it, hyung." Jongin muffled, as he turns his back away from Kyungsoo. 

"Are you crazy? What if someone sees me? Aren't you scared? What if its _ Dispatch _ , god knows what would happen." He blabbers but the young idol probably didn't heard anything since he just got a snore from him as a reply.

"Great." Kyungsoo mumbled under his breath. He hurriedly stands up and grabs a pair of his decent clothes from Jongin's closet (yes, Jongin already gave him a part in his cabinet, he owns the left side, Jongin owns the right) since wearing the one's on the floor seems to be not appealing in greeting a guest. He fixes his hair, trying to neatly brush it up to cover what mess happened last night. 

"Who is it?" He asked thru the security camera's mic just to make sure it was not some of the _sasaeng_ who casually harasses Jongin. A few moments later, a familiar man shows his face on the camera and. Fuck-- its Jongin's manager.

"Junmyeon?" He blabbers as he opens the door.

"Kyungsoo?" The man replied, giving him as quizzical look. 

A moment of awkward silence resurface, Kyungsoo fidgets his fingers as he bites the inside of his cheeks, nervous to what the manager was thinking or if ever he already has any hints on what's happening. His mind goes chaotic while searching for idiotic alibis or whatnot. 

"So, why are you here? Is there something Jongin needs assistance to?" He clicks his tongue as he stares at Kyungsoo, glaring at him from the head to toe, both arms resting on his waist. Kyungsoo snaps back to his zone, taking his time before he replies. 

"I called for him, what do you want Jun? It's too early." Kyungsoo's heart did a double take the moment he saw Jongin walks out from the corridor, wearing nothing but his boxer short, half of his body is exposed, his neck still has love marks around it. He was leaning against the wall, eyes half opened and his hair tossed away, flying in all directions. 

"You've got to be kidding me." Junmyeon replies exasperatedly. He walked towards the idol and clasp one of his arms, "Jongin, do you know what you're doing? Do you know what--"

"Calm down, Jun." Jongin tossed his managers hand away from him. "Come inside and let's talk." He then signals his manager to walk towards his room, leaving Kyungsoo alone and in shock in the living room. 

Kyungsoo worriedly walks pacing back and forth towards the huge living room and kitchen. He also tried drinking a glass of water, maybe it would help him calm down. He breathes deep as he questions himself. Are they busted? Would this be his last day of work? He swears to god he’s going to give Jongin a lesson after walking out of his room with that look knowing that there was another person in his pad. 

"I… I can't believe both of you." Those were Junmyeon’s last words before he walks out of Jongin’s unit and shuts the door loudly in disappointment.

"What did you tell him, Jongin? Don't tell me..-" Kyungsoo questions as his eyes narrows at the idol.

"I told him the truth." Jongin shrugged.

"What? Are you crazy? Why didn't you even asked me? Why did you decide all by yourself?" Kyungsoo growls back at him, his hands grabbing a handful of his own thick black hair. 

"Why is everyone panicking? Geez. I’m the one with a reputation to protect here in the first place."

"Because you just decided on an issue that involves us, you should've consulted with me first." Kyungsoo replied, voice close to shout and filled with annoyance. 

"So you're mad at me now?" Jongin says with a downcast gaze. He frowns as he stares back at him, a little pout starts to form on his lips. 

"Oh, no. No. Don't use that face to me Nini. Just…" Kyungsoo heaves a sigh of defeat as he reaches out for Jongin. "I'm not mad at you, it's just.. it's quite a big decision to make by yourself." He brushes the mess of Jongin's hair and tucks a few strands behind his ears. "What exactly did you say to your manager?"

"I just told him that we're dating." Kyungsoo flinches back, his fingers massaging his temples, it's going to be a long day accompanied by the worse headache.

"Why did you.." He pauses when he noticed that his voice were getting aloud again. He breathes deeply and then he utters softly and slowly this time, "Why did you tell him, Nini? What did he say?" 

"He’s mad of course, you know him. But give him time and he will understand and accept everything.” Jongin holds Kyungsoo’s hand and rubs them, “I think it's time to tell him now, and I'm sure our secret is safe with Junmyeon. That guy would do everything just to protect my image." He ended as he pulls his hands from Kyungsoo and started tugging his assistant's arms. "Now can we please go back to bed, I'm still sleepy." He drags Kyungsoo towards the room. Jongin sits on the bed and Kyungsoo scoots beside him, their weight pressed together in the center. 

"Everything will be fine, Soo." He promised while snuggling into the sheets and Kyungsoo lays down beside him, covering both of them in a blanket. "I hope so, Jongin." Kyungsoo replied worriedly. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long to update this one. I tried cutting this a bit. Here it goes..

Jongin pants and slouches his back while he solidly hits the cold floor. He spread his arms and legs while lying down on the room. He’s been practicing the whole weekend for his upcoming Japan tour. 

They should only repeat the whole routine twice if there were no mistakes done, but being a perfectionist that he is, the routine was done five times. He asked the dancers to take their break after the second rehearsal and he’ll just continue with the rest of the practice until he’s satisfied. 

Pushing himself to the limit is his motto but Kyungsoo disagrees with it. He knows the moment they’ll get back home, Jongin would shut down his door, crying his heart out. From pain, fatigue, frustrations, from all the expectations he need to satisfy. Being an idol was fun at first, but being this popular really puts too much weight on Jongin’s shoulders.

“You’re done and you’re not going to repeat that again today.” Kyungsoo baffles while approaching the idol from the backstage, handing him a towel and a bottle of water. “I’m glad you’re here Soo.” Jongin replied as he messily throws his arms around Kyungsoo, hugging him as he rests his chin on his assistant's shoulder. Kyungsoo froze on his position, contemplating if he would hug him back or he would push him away. 

He hasn't even decided which was the right thing to do when they heard a man faking a cough behind them.

“Excuse me, please keep it low, we’re in a public place.” Junmyeon pulls the idol away from his assistant and narrowly stares at him. “I already told you, this would ruin your career Jongin.”

“You just noticed it because you already know. We’ve been like this from the start Jun, stop acting shitty. You’re making everything obvious.” Jongin walks past through his manager, tugging Kyungsoo’s arm as they both head to the dressing room. But that did not stop Junmyeon from bothering them. He followed them and slams the door open, making Jongin and Kyungsoo startled in their place. 

“This needs to stop now.” Junmyeon exclaims with a demanding voice. Jongin walked towards him and stops when he was already in front of his manager, his arms resting on his chest. “And if not, what would you do? Come on Jun, we’re not even doing anything. You’re just being paranoid.”

“What if other notice this, too? What if other people see you? It would be the end of_ Kai _.” His manager leaned his back against the wall, throwing his head in annoyance. Jongin did not respond, he knows he will lose this argument, his manager would do everything just to protect his image, even if that means breaking him and Kyungsoo apart. 

Junmyeon snaps his fingers, his eyes suddenly widens and glows. “I have an idea, just wait. And keep everything low for now, okay?” He beams a smile at Jongin while he stared furiously at Kyungsoo who was just sitting at the back, fidgeting his fingers on the hem of his shirt. 

  
Junmyeon hurriedly exits the room. The two of them were left inside without any idea what was the manager planning to do. But Jongin feels it's something not _ right. _

The first two days of his concert at Fukuoka was indeed a success. Tickets on the whole Japan tour was sold out in less than ten minutes. Fans giving him gifts and cards with letter of appreciation here and there, and he could not ask for more. He is well loved by his fans, for sure. His fans are the main reason why he's still holding on to his career, he owes them almost everything.

Jongin runs toward the dressing room to finally change to a more comfortable clothes. He opens the door in full swing, eyes scanning every person at that moment. He keeps on bowing at every one, shaking their hands and thanking them for their hard work. 

One by one, the staffs, production assistants and directors leaves the area until only him and Junmyeon was left. He felt a twist on his stomach when his manager walks in front of him, giving him a lopsided smile. Something is really wrong.

“Well done is an understatement on what you did back there, Kai.” He did not respond on the compliment thrown to him by his manager, instead, he stared back at him furiously, eyes demanding for an answer even if there were no questions asked.

“Ah, I forgot to tell you. Kyungsoo. He had already left. He said he wasn’t feeling good so I allowed him.” Jongin was not able to contain his temper anymore when he grabs Junmyeon by the collar of his shirt. 

“I’ll ask you just once Jun, where is Kyungsoo?” He questions exasperatedly. His manager pushed him away, strong enough for the idol to hit the wall.

“Wake up, Jongin. You don’t need him. You’re doing great without him!” 

“For fucks sake Junmyeon, where the hell is Kyungsoo?” His manager smiles smugly at him as he slowly pulls his cellphone from his pocket. He presses the keys and scrolls through his contact list and selects a number.

_ “Hello?” _ The man on the other line answers, voice is too familiar and Jongin knows it was his assistant. Junmyeon puts him on speaker so Jongin can clearly hear their conversation.

_ “Hey, Kyungsoo. Are you on your way home? Please tell your mom I send my regards.” _ Junmyeon responds, eyes darted at Jongin, the devious smirk not leaving his face. Jongin swears he’s going to punch him anytime.

_ “Sure, I will. Thanks Jun.” _

_ “No problem, just call me if you still need anything okay? I’ll take care of everything now.” _ Junmyeon presses the red button on his phone and ended the call leaving Jongin appalled. It took Jongin a few minutes before he absorbs everything he had heard.

“He’s going back to Korea alone? What did you do?” The idol’s voice was hoarse and loud, obviously filled with aggravation.

“You know his mom needs therapy, right? I gave him enough money so he would not be bothered to work anymore and he could concentrate on taking care of her.” He pauses for a while, his hand patting Jongin’s shoulder. 

“And he accepted it. He agreed that he will leave you and will just quietly stay in their humble home back in their province. Feel bad for you, Jongin. Thought he really loved you.” He clicks his tongue a few times, adding more tension between him and the idol.

“I don’t believe you.” Jongin replied, brushing his manager’s arms away from him. Junmyeon walked towards the door with infuriating slowness and turns the knob, “Go and check it yourself.” He was about to close the door when he suddenly remembered one important detail that Jongin needs to know. “And by the way, I already arranged the contract. Our lawyers will be the one to clear everything up. Call me if you need me to drive for you.” He closes the door.

Jongin felt a pang in his chest, he trust Kyungsoo so much, he knows he would not do what Junmyeon intended to tell him. He searched for his bag and hurriedly gets his phone, dialling Kyungsoo’s number. On his first attempt, there was no answer. He dialled again, twice, thrice, on the fifth try, the call was cancelled. He attempted again to call one last time, he breathes deeply, nervous if Kyungsoo would hang-up on him again, but to his dismay, the phone was already turned off. With no second thoughts, he immediately dashed towards the parking lot. In this wee hours of the night, he decided that he’ll look for Kyungsoo. 

He still got three more days before his next concert, he still got time. Jongin suddenly neglects his feeling of tiredness from the concert which just literally ended not more than an hour ago. His only focus is just to find his assistant and get to know what really happened. He can’t believe his manager did an outrageous thing to him.

It’s an hour-long drive from the stadium towards the airport, maybe Kyungsoo was still there waiting for his flight. He felt stupid running to the airport without a plane ticket, what would he do if Kyungsoo’s plane already took off?

“What time is the next flight to Seoul?” He asked the girl in the information desk who was surprised to see him. He somehow forgot that he was a famous idol even if he's in Japan, and judging by the way he looks, he was really standing out from the crowd. 

He was still wearing his blue velvet long sleeves, with dots of white for additional elegance. It looks totally normal on the front view, but the back was distractingly sexy. His back was widely open, only one button on the top portion of the material was holding the shirt together. It was paired with a leather pants, fitting to every muscle of his legs and thighs with a suspender hooked on both of his shoulders. His tanned skin and defined back line was more emphasize, his makeup was still full on his face and his gray hair was neatly styled, even if he was perspiring and panting, anybody would surely recognize him at that moment.

"K...Kai?" The girl on the reception desk greeted. "Mr. Kai it's a pleasure to meet you." 

Jongin pauses and blinks for a few minutes, thinking about how to handle the situation. He scratches the back of his neck before he turns back to the girl. "Uhmm, Hi and thank you. I would just want to ask you for something, is it okay?" He beams a soft smile to her. He's using his charms just to squeeze a few details about the flights and if he could get a chance for a ticket back to Seoul as soon as possible.

His charisma does wonderful magic that night. He found out that the plane going to Seoul just took off 3 hours ago. It was during his concert, of course, Junmyeon planned everything already and Kyungsoo is probably on his way to his hometown.

He already has this gut feeling that something was off about his assistant. Kyungsoo did not even give him a pep talk before the concert starts that day, which is absurd because he always does it and he never missed, not even once. He just told the idol that he will go back to the hotel since he forgot a few of his things which was totally odd, too, knowing how articulate Kyungsoo is, but Jongin lets it slip because he still got a concert to face. He just smiled lovingly at his assistant as he watched him walk away from the stadium.

Jongin patiently waits for an hour, tapping his feet nervously on the ground, he's feeling anxious since he's radically unsure if what he did was right. He'll get a scolding from the agency and Junmyeon, surely, but that's not his concern for now. He needs to get Kyungsoo back and to hear the truth from him. 

His phone vibrates from his pocket. He panically pulls it and answered the call without even checking the caller's name. 

_ "What the hell do you think you're doing Jongin?" _ A loud scowl bangs on his ear, he checked his phone to know who the caller is, unfortunately it's from Junmyeon. _ "I checked the car's GPS, you're in the airport? Really, Jongin? You're going that far?" _

_ "It was you who provoked me to do this Jun, it was all your fault in the first place." _ Jongin hangs his phone and turned it off.

He just needs to wait for a few minutes before his flight.

The first thing he did was to call Sehun - his friend since childhood - to pick him up and to bring a less noticeable clothes for him, the moment he landed in Seoul. The man has the same height and built as him so there was no problem on the clothes sizes. 

Sehun was already waiting for him in the comfort room with a paper bag on his hand. He speedily shook his costume off and wears a pair of plain black shirt and pants. He washed his face and his hair, covering it with a bonnet. Sehun hands him a mask to cover his face as they step out of the airport. 

Their plan seemed to work as no one noticed him, not even those media who were waiting on the front entrance of the arrival area, trying to scoop some news from whoever might arrive. He asked Sehun to drive him back to his unit first, his friend still doesn't know the whole story, but he'll surely do anything to help Jongin. 

"Thank you, Sehunnie." Jongin taps his friend's back before he alights his car. "Just be careful Jongin, and call me if you need any help." Sehun replied to which Jongin nodded. He waved at the idol before he moves his car away from Jongin's place.

Jongin haphazardly ran towards his unit, clumsily tapping his card key as he reached the door. He needs to get the spare key of his car so he could drive to Kyungsoo's hometown. His assistant was the one to keep his keys so he has no other option but to go home first. He doesn't want to bother Sehun anymore, he's been enough of burdensome to his friend already and he's thankful that Sehun was always there for him.

The lights on his living room automatically turns on as it senses movement when he walks through it. He was dashing his way towards his bedroom but to his surprise, the door of his room was left ajar. He's a hundred percent sure he closed it before they all fly to Japan. 

He stopped in front of the door, staring at it. Maybe Kyungsoo stopped by to get his things. Maybe some-

"Jongin? What are you doing here?" His heart did a backflip the moment he saw a small man glancing at him with brows furrowed. He hastily ran and jumps to the man, embracing him like there's no tomorrow. 

"Hyung, you're here." He utters while he sobs, his tears rapidly flowing in a continual phase from his eyes. He never loosen the hug even a bit, not letting Kyungsoo to move from his spot.

"Jongin, I can't b-rea-the." Kyungsoo grunts, Jongin was locking him in his arms a bit too much and he got suffocated. "What are you doing here? How did you even get a ticket to fly here?" Kyungsoo questions when Jongin finally released him.

"I had my ways, I'll answer all of that later." Jongin replied while rubbing the tears from his eyes. 

"Please answer me honestly without being threatened by Junmyeon." He scoots closer and holds both of Kyungsoo's hand. 

"Why did you leave? Did you really ended the contract? Did you really accept the money from him?" He stares at Kyungsoo's eyes as he waits for the answer.

"Honestly," Kyungsoo pulls his hand from Jongin. He turns his back and walks toward the bed, sitting on the corner. He pursed his lips before he continued, "Yes, I told Junmyeon that I would go away as much as I can."

Jongin sighs, feeling defeated, as he scoots beside Kyungsoo. His face tilted and his eyebrows arched asking a silent,_ "But why?" _

"I didn't receive any money from him though. I immediately transferred back the money he sent on my bank account. But I'm sure you were beside him when he called me so I just played along. Maybe Jun is right. Maybe I'm just going to ruin your career."

"Soo, we've been doing this for more than a year, why are you saying this now?" Jongin stands up and kneeled in front of his assistant, levelling their eyes. His thumb gently caresses Kyungsoo's cheeks, rubbing comforting circles. 

"I'm not gonna let anything happen to you. I'll take care of Jun and the contract. Just promise me one thing, please." He begs, eyes slowly becoming glassy as he stares at Kyungsoo, a well of tears attempting to stream down his face.

"Don't… don't leave me, Soo. Please." A solitary tear trickled down his cheek and wobbling chin, followed by another, and another until he sobs and his hands falls down to Kyungsoo's thighs.

Defeated. 

Kyungsoo lifts the idol's chin and runs his thumb on his face, wiping the tears away. "Sorry Nini, I promise I won't."

-

Next stop of Kai's tour is at Osaka. A 2-Day sold out concert. He was really overwhelmed. The love of his fans for him is incomparable and that's why he always makes it a point that all of his performances should be done perfectly or in his own words, a hundred and twelve percent.

A day before his concert, he decided to fly back to Japan. With enough reasons on his mind, he concluded he can now face Junmyeon since he already got the approval from the higher ups from his agency.

"Did you miss me?" He shrugged as he entered Junmyeon's room in the hotel they were staying in Osaka. He was holding an envelope on his one hand, while the other is tucked inside his pants, the door was left ajar.

"Look who decided to finally show up. Scared to lose your career, I see. I told you, I know best." Junmyeon replied as he stands up from the sofa, a grin was visible on his face. He was still on his sleepwear since it's still 6 o'clock in the morning. He walks closer to Jongin and was about to reach for the envelope the idol was holding when Jongin puts his hand over his head, making Jun unable to reach for it.

"Hold your horses, Jun. You've got some visitor." His manager, looking annoyed, tilted his head and gave him a quizzical look. Jongin swings the door open and pulls the person behind him who seems to be hiding in the dark.

"K...Kyungsoo? What are you doing here? Your contract is not valid anymore. And I thought I already cleared everything with you?" Junmyeon retorts.

"Got an approval from the management, Kyungsoo is still my assistant." He smirked and chortled sarcastically. "Sorry honey, but all those efforts to end his contract were worthless." He shoves the envelope on Junmyeon's chest.

He turned his back away from Junmyeon while he tugs Kyungsoo on his arm as they left Junmyeon speechless. Jongin was about to reach for the knob of the door when he decided to backpedal. His eyes narrowed and darted at Junmyeon when he uttered, "By the way, read the last paragraph of the new contract. Kyungsoo will stay as my assistant unless," He raises his index finger, "One, I was the one who terminated his contract, or two," He hoist two fingers for emphasis, "He resigned. So there's no way you could intervene. Mind your own business next time."

Jongin slammed the door behind him as he and Kyungsoo leaves. With a loud bang, they left Junmyeon speechless.

Like the usual concerts, the 2-day event in Osaka was a blast. Jongin receives positive feedbacks and responses about his passion and love for the fans. And he was more than thankful. 

He might be tired with all the clogged up schedule on his neck but he enjoys it. Doing what he loves together with the most important person in his life right now and earning by just showing skillfully his passion and talent, it's a double win for him.

He's looking forward for the next two weeks since they'll be staying in Japan for a while. His last stop will be at Yokohama Arena in Kanagawa. Jongin still has enough time to practice his routine more and to relax for a bit, spending more time for himself and, of course, with Kyungsoo.

To avoid suspicion from other members of the production and staff, they were still making an all out effort to be as discreet as possible. Yes, Junmyeon is already aware about him and Kyungsoo, and yes, he and his manager are not in good terms now, but Jongin knows the man would keep the secret to his grave. Junmyeon will never ruin his career.

There’s always a cloud of thought and urge around Jongin’s mind though that he really needs to change his manager since recently, Jun is getting a little nosy.

A continual ring on the phone woke Jongin up at 7:00 AM. He has no schedule that day, he could just rest. Also him and Kyungsoo have the whole day to spend together, it's the last day of his slumbering since tomorrow will be the start of their rehearsal again. What kind of evil is stealing this last precious day from him?

He sits up and rested his head on the headboard of his bed, reaching out for his phone on the side table. He clears his throat before he answers, _ "Hello?" _

_ "Good morning. This is Mr. Choi, your manager called and mentioned about your comeback and mini album soon." _ One of the producers of their agency called him. Right, the devil. 

Wait, what? They didn't even discussed anything about this nor was mentioned to him even once. He's currently on tour, how can he manage to pull on a comeback and a mini album? Just by thinking about this makes his body shivers.

  
_ "I'm sorry Mr. Choi, I was not informed about this. Can I.. Can I talk to Junmyeon first?" _He stuttered, his free hand anxiously tapping his thigh. It was a few silent nerve-wracking seconds of his life as he waits for the producer to respond.

_"Junmyeon says everything was already settled. But if that's what you want. We are already gathering up and preparing for the album. Everything will be discussed right after your last concert in Japan."_ Then he hangs up, he didn't even let Jongin respond nor breath.

Jongin slouched his back and sighed defeatedly, he knows his manager is up to something again. He's tired of it and his borderline browned off by Junmyeon's attitude. Why is he acting rude since the day he found out about him and Kyungsoo?

He doesn’t care if Junmyeon is still asleep by the time he decided to barged-in inside his manager’s room. 

A loud bang surrounded them, making Junmyeon and another man startled in their place.

“Guess you forgot how to knock. Good morning Jongin, you’re just in time.” His manager greeted him sarcastically with a grimace on his face.

“We need to talk. Now!” Jongin’s voice was demanding, eyes flaring directly at Junmyeon. It seems like he didn’t notice that there was another person inside the room. 

“We’ll talk about that later. But for now, try to calm down and give your greetings to Lee Taemin. He’s the choreographer I got for your new album. I’m sure you’ve heard about it already.”

“So really, that’s how it works now? Not even asking me if I want to release a new one?”

Junmyeon stands up, walking towards him and giving him a pitiful look, “You know the management always decides for you, not the other way around.” He smirks and turns around.

“Sorry about this Taemin, and please don’t get it wrong. Our Kai is not a rude man. Right, Kai?” 

A vast realization hits Jongin when he finally breaks out from his zone. Junmyeon was right. It’s always the management, and never him.

He had no choice but to bow in greeting and introduce himself briefly. He takes the hand that the choreographer offered and shakes it. 

“Pleasure meeting the Idol of all idols.” Taemin says as he smiles to Jongin. 

“I’ll just go get ready, let’s meet in the coffee shop down the hotel so we could discuss.” Jongin excuses himself and exits his manager’s room.

His Japan tour finally came to an end. With all those love and support from his fans, he’s sure all those hard work were already paid off.

The whole team celebrated right after on a bar near their hotel. Jongin’s next schedule will be after a month so the whole team gets to rest. Aside from those that will assist him on his new album.

Everyone were shocked when they heard about the album to be released in two months. Yes it’s a mini album but preparing for such would take longer. The venue for the music video, the concept, and obviously, all those overtime works for editing and recording. 

Kyungsoo shrugged as he sits beside Jongin, handing him a glass of cocktail, to which Jongin gladly reached.

“I still can’t believe they did this. I already planned on taking a break for this month and yet here comes another storm.” Kyungsoo heaved a deep sigh before he takes a sip from the glass of wine on his hand.

Jongin leans closer to him, tilting his head in confusion. “You got plans? You haven’t told me.” 

“I’m just going to visit my mom. She needs me.” Kyungsoo sighed as he places the glass on the table. He then stared at nothingness. “I just need a week off, I really want to visit her.”

The idol seemed to empathize with him and nodded softly. “You could take a break for a week after we get back to Seoul.” His face then slowly forms a cheeky smile and Kyungsoo gnarls. 

“I know that look. What do you want, Jongin?” 

“Can I come?” His eyes were pleading like that of a puppy while a small pout slowly protrudes from his mouth.

“You know how badly I wanted you to meet her too, but it’s not that simple.” Kyungsoo stares at him with an apologetic frown.

“Don’t worry, I can think of a way.” Jongin taps his assistant’s back for reassurance.

-

Light flashes, hundreds of fans running in all directions, phone cameras which were almost shoved into his face. That’s what welcomed Jongin as soon as they landed back in Seoul.

He was tired. Dead-tired. Despite that, he got no choice but to stand diligently and with poise, bowing at each and every part of the airport. By this time, he resents being the idol _ Kai_. He just wants to be Jongin and live normally. To slow down if he’s tired, to cry if he feels sad, not all this fake stunts he needs to show just so he can please everyone. 

Sadly, it's still part of his job.

Jongin had never thanked face masks before as much as today. He normally dislikes it since it gives him a difficulty in breathing. But today, it helped him as he doesn’t need to smile from ear to ear since his face is half covered.

We walks briskly, bowing every time he can, waving his hand on every fans. He also reaches out for the letters given to him. For Jongin, those were the most precious gift he could ever receive. They were almost at the exit of the airport when suddenly, a huge crowd with bigger cameras, microphones and lights were waiting for them. Like hungry lions waiting for their prey.

Right, the media. He almost forgot.

They surrounded him like hungry hyenas, shoving their microphones and recorders on his face.

**Reporter 1:**

_ “Mr. Kai, there are rumors that you went back to Korea a few days ago by yourself. What's the reason?” _

**Reporter 2:**

_ “Kai, we've heard you did it to sneak out and see your girlfriend. Who is she?” _

**Reporter 3:**

_ “Is she an idol, too?” _

The commotion on the airport's exit got worse when the security was caught off guard, making the sasaengs and fans run towards him. 

The staffs and other members of his team decided to cover him and trying to keep him away from the predators.

"Kai is tired right now. We will answer those questions as soon as possible." Junmyeon took over and replied to the group of reporters. He then pulls Jongin out of the crowd. 

As much as he hates to do it, he asked for Kyungsoo's help. Being the idol's assistant, he signals him to take Jongin outside and to immediately enter the black van waiting for them. 

Jongin quickly grabs onto Kyungsoo's hand for dear life as they ran towards the exit and away from all the bustle of people who crowded and cornered him.

They sat on the back seat, side-by-side, inside the van. Kyungsoo noticed that Jongin was forming his fist into a ball, his knuckles turned to white. He also heard Jongin cursing and blaming himself. He then puts his hand over Jongin's knuckles, gently drawing comforting circles with his thumb. 

"I'm sorry, this is all my fault." Kyungsoo whispers. Jongin's bowed head slowly lifts to his side to face his assistant. 

"No, it's not your fault. It's Junmyeon. I'll.. I'll handle this." He slowly relaxed his fist and intertwined his fingers with Kyungsoo.

"But Jongin, your career is at stake. I don't want you to lose anything because of m..-" Kyungsoo's words were interrupted when Jongin gently places his index finger on Kyungsoo's plump lips. 

"I'll handle this. Trust me."

It was strange. After all the chaos that happened last night, he did not receive any call or text message from his manager, not even from anyone on his agency. He was expecting he will be scolded big time. His career is on the line, and being the image of their agency, he knows he's about to get doomed.

This morning, he was planning to go directly to Label SM, Inc., the agency he's been working on for years, to give them a piece of his mind. Explain to them what really happened, and maybe, if he can muster enough strength and courage, maybe he could open up about him and his assistant.

He was already preparing and was ready to head out from his unit. He opened the door but to his surprise, Kyungsoo was already standing in front of it and was about to knock. 

"Soo, what are you doing here?" He questions while rapidly blinking his eyes, making sure he's not imagining things.

"Stopping you on whatever you are planning to do." Kyungsoo replied nonchalantly. He squeezed himself on the small opening of the door and invited himself in. 

"I bought you some food too and I'm gonna prepare a 2-day meal for you. Looks like you won't be going out for a couple of days." Kyungsoo walked towards the kitchen and pulls out the packs inside the paper bag he was holding one by one. 

Jongin is really not a fan of social media. He distates it. Who would want to read toxic feedbacks or comments from other people who aren't even your fans?

  
"Why? What happened?" He asked worriedly as he reached out for his phone. He scrolls towards _Naver._

"What the-" Jongin's eyes widened the moment he clicks the number 1 trending news. He sighed heavily, preparing himself for the upcoming storm he's about to face.

The moment he thought he was ready, he clicks in the first suggested article with his name on it.

_"Label SM, Inc. confirmed dating rumors between Kai and idol from the same agency. Confirmation from both idols are yet to be confirmed."_

His breath hitched. He decided to turn his phone off, not wanting anyone to call for confirmation or whatnot. His eyes widened, mouth agape.

"Fans and media are downstairs waiting for you. Good thing the security here doesn't suck. No one was able to enter aside from authorized people." Kyungsoo approaches the still-shocked Jongin who's seated on the couch. Kyungsoo holds his hand and press a soft kiss on it.

"I got some… something to suggest, Nini." His voice sounds a bit off, and Jongin knows something wrong.

"I thought you promised me you won't leave me?" Jongin replied, voice shaking in disbelief.

"Jongin, listen, your career is at stake." He pauses and inhaled deeply.

"Junmyeon called me, and just to make things clear, even if he doesn't ask me to do this, I still would. I saw how devastated you look last night. You can't hide it from me."

Jongin was quiet and was avoiding his assistant's gaze. And Kyungsoo takes it as a sign for him to continue. 

"If you were to choose now, would you choose me over your career?"

Jongin felt a bomb was just dropped inside his chest and explodes. Not expecting the sudden question from his assistant, he immediately pulls his hand and stands up from the couch. He walked back and forth on a fast pace, fidgeting his fingers and biting his lips, unsure on how to react on Kyungsoo's question.

Kyungsoo decided to break the buzzing sound of awkward silence between them as he stands up and held both Jongin's hand, making him stop his from his motion. "See, I know this day would come Jongin." He stares at him sincerely, with a bit of tear visible on his eyes, "That's why I've already decided."

"Wh..What do you mean?"

"I'll be leaving tomorrow to visit my mom. I already told you, right? But you can't come with me. You need to stay here and I need to-" He rubs Jongin's hands for comfort. 

"I need to stay away from you as much as I can. It's the only way Jongin. In no time, you'll forget about me. I assure you." Kyungsoo swallowed the lump that was staying in his throat for god knows how long. He let's go of Jongin's hands and turns back, walking back towards the kitchen.

"I'll prepare some food for you, then I'll leave once everything is done. Trust Junmyeon on this, he'll handle it smoothly, like he always does."

Jongin just stayed on the couch silently. Thinking if there are still any other way to let Kyungsoo stay. He doesn’t know what to do without him by his side.

Kyungsoo finishes with food preparation and leaves everything inside Jongin's fridge. With a sticky note on each container on how to reheat and prepare the meals, he assures himself the idol could survive for two days with those. 

Two days are enough for Jongin to break his silence from the media, from the fans and his agency. It's enough time to reflect and decides on how to manage the standpoint he is currently on. 

"So, that's it? You're leaving me?" Jongin shrugged as he halted Kyungsoo who was about to reach for the door. 

"I already told you, I need to visit my mom." He brushed the strands of hair falling on Jongin's face and tucked it behind his ears. He tiptoes and places a soft and quick kiss on Jongin's plush lips. 

"You need time for yourself, too, Nini. I will let you to decide. No one knows better than yourself except you."

Jongin clings unto his assistant's arms, pleading and asking him not to leave. "But, how can… How should I face this?"

Kyungsoo pats Jongin's shoulder and gives gives him a sincere smile. "No matter what you decide, I'll be here for you. As an assistant or as a friend or maybe as someone who loves you from afar." 

A single tear dropped from Kyungsoo's eyes to which he wiped immediately. He was thankful Jongin was not able to notice it, he doesn't want to leave with an aching heart. 

"Alright, time for me to go Nini. I'll be back next week."

"Will you see me once you're back?"

"It depends on what you and the management decides. But, I will always be here." Jongin pulls him for tight hug, not letting Kyungsoo move or maybe even breath.

"I'm scared Hyung."

Kyungsoo pulls back from the hug gently when he felt Jongin hiccuped behind his neck. 

Jongin was sobbing. So he decided to somehow give him a… goodbye kiss.

Kyungsoo leans closer and cupped Jongin's face, parting his lips as he lock their mouths together in a soft but needy kiss. 

Jongin reciprocates and angles his head, his lips parted, allowing Kyungsoo glides his tongue inside, smoothly licking every part of Jongin's swollen mouth while Jongin nibbles on Kyungsoo's plump and warm lower lip.

The kiss deepens, Jongin is now holding Kyungsoo behind his neck while his assistant digs his fingers on Jongin's firm chest.

It lasted for a while when Kyungsoo decided to end their quick make out and leaves another peck, soft and loving, on Jongin's lips. "I'll see you next week Jongin. Take care, okay?"

Jongin wanted to run unto him and ask him to stay but deep inside, he knows, this is what they really need to do to set things straight. 

He watched Kyungsoo as he leaves his unit, as he rides the elevator and until his silhouette is gone from his periphery.

He got a whole scandal to face, and what bothers him the most aside from the fact that it's certainly not true, is that he knows Kyungsoo is hurting, and he can't do anything about it.

Kyungsoo was right. All he needs is two days to think it all over. Two days to decide what and what not to do. So he finally decided to face the media and press the moment he steps inside the agency.

"Finally, our lover boy showed up." Junmyeon teases while he offered Jongin a hug but the idol rejects him and walks directly to the couch and sits.

"I'm releasing a statement today. Call the PR department so they could take notes and release it." He pauses and stares furiously at his manager. "Word per word." He emphasized.

Junmyeon quickly obliged as he instantly dials the local of the PR department from his phone, and in less than 5 minutes, two representatives arrived with their tablets and recorders.

Jongin started on his statement while the representatives quickly take notes and records everything, making sure none of the words would be missed out as the idol instructed earlier. 

It took less than an hour to finish the short talk and Jongin exits his manager's office without giving him a single word. He stands up and hastily walks towards the door and leaves.

It's been a week since the scandal booms out. It was also a week full of schedule, a week full of practice and shooting for the music video. A week jam-packed with the things he loves to do before but now, it somehow changed.

Before, he was full of passion. With every practice, he sees to it that he had given his 200%, with every step and every move. But now, his execution were sloppy and lax, his facial expression were not even close as to what he used to do. He just felt he had lost a battle, a silent war with none other by himself.

He's defeated. Defeated by his dreams.

He lazily puts his weight on his bed the moment he reached his unit. Finally, a time for him to rest. But for the past few days, he was not able to catch a good sleep albeit his always exhausted from the rehearsal and all the packed schedule. He just can't seem to relax. This started when his statement was released to the public. 

Luckily, Kyungsoo extended his stay on his mother's place to spend more time with her. He called Jongin a few days ago to give him updates. Jongin understands it, and in fact, he even gave financial assistance to Kyungsoo's mother to finish her therapy and medication. 

But Kyungsoo still haven't heard of his statement and he knew once his assistant reads it, everything between them will be done even before it started (officially).

The moment Kyungsoo drops back to Seoul was the only time he had to check on the article about Jongin. He was prepared for this, mentally, but his chest constricted by the time he navigates through the page and clicks on the first suggested article:

_"Label SM Inc idol, Kai, confirms rumor on dating his labelmate, Irene. On the statement he had given, he states that they were dating for three months now. He also added that the main reason why he flew back to Korea during his Japan tour was indeed Irene."_

He sighed as pulls himself together, back flat on the couch in his small apartment. He's suddenly regretting why he signed the revised contract.

Kyungsoo haven't informed Jongin that he's already back. And now he's even contemplating to either tell the idol that he's home or to just get his schedule directly from his manager and just to resume the work he had left for two weeks.

He decided to take on the latter. Kyungsoo called Junmyeon and asks for Jongin's schedule and the list of things he needs to accomplish so he could assist in the wardrobe for Jongin's jacket filming later that evening.

-

Jongin arrives early on the photoshoot, as always. He's never late since time is important in this field of work and he distates anyone who doesn't respect his time.

He hurries over the make-up artists and hair stylist as he watched them do their magic to turn the big frown on his face to a more dangerous and sexy look. 

Everything has been set just in time aside from one main detail. The wardrobes are not on sight. The idol rolled his eyes in dismay and stands up from the chair he was sitting on as he scans the area.

"Who's responsible for the costumes? Call him now, I don't have enough time to wait for his lazy ass." His bitchiness returned since someone was not there to control him. To taunt him.

"Me. I'm here." A deep voice responded and got Jongin startled. He turns his back to a sight of Kyungsoo walking towards the venue, tugging a few clothes on his arms. But it's a bit weird since he's wearing a…

"Sunglasses? In the dark of the evening? Why? You have sore eyes or something? And when did you get back? You should've texted me so I could pick--"

Kyungsoo shushed him when he walks closer, handling the materials to other assistant around the set, before he face Jongin. 

"As per checking, I'm still on time. 5 minutes ahead actually. Maybe you just started a bit earlier than the call time." He shrugs.

"Anyway, there's the complete set of wardrobe you need for the whole photoshoot. This was also given to me by Jun, he said I should give this to you on my way here." Kyungsoo hands him a manila envelope. Jongin tries to touch Kyungsoo's hand for a bit when their fingers brushed lightly but his assistant flicks him when the envelope was already secured on Jongin’s his hand. 

He doesn't get it. Why is Kyungsoo acting so weird? They were quite okay the last time they talked on the phone.

Did he already--? No. NO.

Jongin walks briskly, 3 big steps to be specific, to reach for Kyungsoo's arms. 

"Have you read the-.." He was interrupted mid-talk when Kyungsoo pulls away from him.

"I'm leaving now since my job here is done. Message or call me if you still have something you need Mr. Kai." 

He's Mr. Kai now?? Seriously?

Jongin runs after Kyungsoo when he heedlessly walks away from him and towards the exit. He doesn't like where this is going. Kyungsoo is back and they are finally together again, they should be celebrating now, not the other way around.

He pants as soon as he reached Kyungsoo right in time on the exit. He called for him and he turns back, sunglasses still on.

"What's wrong Kyungsoo? And what's with the Mr. Kai now?" He asks, breathing a little calmer now but he still holds onto his chest. He's not sure if he's ready to hear what his assistant has to say.

"I just told you, my job's done. I'm also tired from the travel, I haven't got enough rest since this morning."

Oh, so he's back since morning but he never told him? But why? Jongin snaps back from his zone when he noticed Kyungsoo almost turned his back on him, ready to leave any time soon.

"Let's talk later Soo. Please?" He closes the gap between them and clasp Kyungsoo's hand. "I'll finish this quick, let's clear things out, okay?"

A soft nod is the only thing he got from Kyungsoo. He was about to hold and hug him tight, right there in the open, when someone shouts and called for him.

"Kai, shoot starts in 5 minutes." 

"Yep, I'll be there." He holds unto Kyungsoo a bit more and kisses the back of his hand.

"Let's meet on my place later? We really need to talk this out, okay?" He informs him again, just for good measure.

As Jongin promised, he finished the shoot as early as he can. He's been in the industry long enough to muster what poses he needs for the shots, what his best angles are. And with his god-sculpted face and physique, the photographer didn't have a hard time to capture the best images of the idol.

He runs his way back to his pad, rummaging through his bag for his card key. The door beeps open and he quickly zooms in, scanning every corner of his unit, looking for the comfort he's been longing for, for two weeks.

There was no sign of Kyungsoo in the living room nor the dining area so he decides to go straight ahead in his _ (their) _ bedroom. Right. Kyungsoo says he's tired, he's probably fast asleep. 

He tiptoes as he entered, afraid that he might startled Kyungsoo from his sleep. He gets in but Kyungsoo was not there. He's about to revolt panic attacks right now. He pulls his phone from his pocket and ready to dial his assistant's number when Kyungsoo stepped out from the bathroom. He's wearing nothing but a towel around his waist, his hair is still damp. 

"Ah, finally." Jongin wasn't able to control himself as he sprint and launches towards Kyungsoo, tugging him into a warm and long overdue hug.

"You don't know how much I missed you Kyungsoo." He murmurs behind Kyungsoo's ears.

"I.. I missed you too, Jongin " He replied, his voice was warm. He feels home. 

Kyungsoo is his home.

Jongin pulls away just so their eyes could meet. He gave Kyungsoo his puppy eyes matched with an upset pout, a face his assistant will never say no to. "What happened.. a while ago? Why were you upset?"

There was a brief moment of silence. Kyungsoo's eyes wander on the corners of the room. Jongin patiently waits for him to respond, holding his back and reassuring him that he's there and ready to listen.

"The.. I mean… Your statement. I've read it." Kyungsoo sighed. He should be prepared for this kind of news but he’s not sure why is he still affected this way. Jongin is an idol with a reputation to take care of.

"So, I'm right. Look, Kyungsoo…" 

"I'm sorry for acting a total dumbass earlier. Maybe I was just tired, and the first thing I've run into was your dating scandal." He interrupts Jongin. Kyungsoo leans closer, embracing Jongin as tight as he can. His ears connected with the idol's chest. 

"I'm sorry Nini.. for being sensitive."

"It's okay Soo," he coos. "You have every right to be jealous because…" He stopped mid-sentence making Kyungsoo pulls away, giving him a quizzical look. 

"Because what, Jongin?"

He breathed in deeply, as if filling his lungs with all the air as much as it can take. He holds Kyungsoo's hand and stares at his doe eyes, "Because I love you, Kyungsoo."

Those two weeks without Kyungsoo by his side makes him sick to his stomach. He realized that now, he's depending every minute of his life to Kyungsoo. He felt a pang on his chest every time he wakes up alone on his California King bed, ordering unhealthy fast foods cos he can't even boil an egg. It’s not that he needs Kyungsoo to take care of him. He just knows his life is incomplete without him. Like a whole was punched on his chest and its making him miserable.

It was then that he realized that he needed to confess to him soon. That he needs to reciprocate the love and affection Kyungsoo gave him all those times.

"Am I hearing things right? Or is this a dream? Jongin, or should I say, _ Kai_, the top idol in his generation, telling him that he loves me? Can you say it again? Maybe I'm just imagining things." He smirks but he's eyes were pure of happiness and contentment as he brushes Jongin's hair on the back of his ear.

"Stop it, I won't say it again." Jongin playfully pretends he’s upset, crossing his arms and giving a disappointed pout. Kyungsoo scoots closer, cupping his face and giving him a soft and warm kiss. 

That's what this moment needs right now.

"You don't know how long I have waited for this, Jongin. I love you too." His eyes were glowing and pure of delight as he give his heart-shaped smile to him, thumbs brushing the crimson on Jongin's cheeks.

"I'll make it up to you this time." Jongin offers, hand still holding Kyungsoo's. "Let's go on a date tomorrow, a proper one." He mental notes that he will explain everything about his statement to Kyungsoo over dinner and that he will deal with the current issue and end it as soon as possible.

Kyungsoo's bright smile turned even brighter, maybe his jaw was aching from too much smiling that night. He nods vigorously as he steals another kiss from Jongin's lips. Soft and loving, warm and comforting, making them both moan between their breaths. 

Jongin pulls out first, giving Kyungsoo a beautiful beam. "I'll handle everything, just wait for it.” He kisses Kyungsoo’s forehead for reassurance.

“Is dinner okay?"

Kyungsoo nods, "Absolutely."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. I really want to add more scenes on this chapter but I just decided to put them on the next one. Sorry for the long wait. Oh, I just joined my first ever Fest, the UTKJI Fic Fest! Please anticipate and try guessing what are mine. I claimed 2 prompts and honestly, that's whats keeping me occupied this past few days. But don't worry, I'll finish this one first :)) Maybe one or 2 more chapters? :)
> 
> Will try to update after two weeks, see you!! ^_^
> 
> Kudos and comments are very much appreciated. It flutters our hearts and gives us more courage. You can talk to me on the comment section. Thank you once again~


	3. Chapter 3

What happened the following morning was all Jongin could ever dream of. Staying late in bed since he only have one schedule for that day, feeling the warmth of the person snuggled beside him. The smell of his cologne and shampoo on his hair, Kyungsoo's warm breath against his bare chest. 

Everything was perfect.

He gently pull himself so he could sit up straight on the bed, his hand never leaving Kyungsoo's hair. Caressing and brushing the black thick strands. But even with his gentle and soft movements, Kyungsoo was awakened from his sleep. He squinted his eyes and stares at the two almond-shaped that's already observing him. Jongin smiled with his eyes, happy lines and wrinkles were visible from his face. Kyungsoo pulls him closer to give him a sweet and soft g_ood morning _kiss.

Today is going to be a good day. 

They planned their dinner this coming weekend so Kyungsoo cleared everything on Jongin's schedule and everything seems to be going the way they intend it to be.

The final shot of his new music video will be this afternoon while the sun is setting. The editor and director agreed that it would be the perfect scenery for their concept. 

Jongin was getting ready for his schedule. He’s already dressed up and preparing his personal things in his small body bag. 

As he rummaged through the pocket of his coat that he used yesterday, searching for his car keys and wallet, he found the envelope that Junmyeon handed over through Kyungsoo. 

Right, he almost forgot about that one. 

While Kyungsoo was in the shower, he took the chance to open it and read whatever Junmyeon was planning again. He sat on the corner of his bed and decided to finally read the mail.

His grip tightened which almost crashed the envelope. He immediately called his manager's number but he didn’t answer. All his calls was transferred to Junmyeon’s voicemail insted. His clenching his jaw from anger because he was right with his suspicion. It's another plan from Junmyeon and the management to _help _him with his 'relationship scandal' or whatever they call it.

"This is bullshit." He tears the paper inside the envelope. He hadn't noticed that Kyungsoo was already out from the shower and heard him. He walked near him and picked up the shattered letter, trying to assemble the pieces to make it readable.

"A.. A date with Irene?" Kyungsoo's eyes grow like a size of baseball. Face full of curiosity and at the same time, fear. 

"They really don't take me seriously, they're always like playing with me. Like a toy. And it's 7 fucking years, I still haven't realized it." Jongin grabs a handful of his hair, face almost beet-red from anger.

"I'm going to talk to them and tell them that this needs to stop."

"And what? You'll destroy your career and everything you've worked hard for?" Kyungsoo replied, his hands crossed over his chest.

Jongin pulls him closer and invites him to sit beside him. He holds both of Kyungsoo's hands and stared at him, eyes filled with nothing but sincerity.

  
  


"There are still agencies that will accept me, I'm sure of that."

"But this is not a simple step, Jongin. Giving up everything just for--" 

"No, it's been two damn years of hiding Soo. And I can't imagine having the dream date with another person except you." Jongin interrupted him as he draws comforting circles on Kyungsoo’s hands. 

Kyungsoo was taken aback. His mouth agape while his eyes sparkled and after a few seconds, a single tear succeeded to fall from his glacy eyes. Jongin wipes it with his thumb while softly caressing his cheek.

"You're with me, right hyung?"

"Of course, I will always be by your side. I'm your number one fan." 

Jongin cupped his cheeks and indulged on his plump lips. A needy kiss is appropriate right now in this time of stress. An open-mouthed kiss where their tongue perfectly finds each other, massaging skillfully each other's lips. 

Jongin pulled out first, panting, while he glanced at Kyungsoo. Wiping the droplets of water from his cheeks before he left another peck on Kyungsoo's red and swollen lips. 

"Thank you so much Soo. You're the only one I needed to do this."

-

"What the-- What do you want?" Junmyeon lashed out the moment Jongin emerges in his office. Jongin walked towards his table and smashed the shattered letter on his hand. 

"This one. Explain to me what do you want!" Jongin grumbled. His eyes narrowly directed to his managers'.

"So you came here for that? It's obvious isn't it? You and Irene should go on a date. The media are harassing me, asking and squeezing details about you." His manager replied with an irritated voice. His hands massaging his temple. “And if this could make you feel better, I already informed Irene and his manager beforehand. They are both okay with it.”

When he got no reply from the idol, Junmyeon decided to stand up from his chair and settles beside Jongin, grabbing the paper from his hands. 

"I know you're mad but we have no choice. I can't tell the media that…." he paused, his eyes sending signals to Jongin while he tilts his head. 

Jongin heaved a deep sigh, moving towards the couch to sit down and Junmyeon followed him, sitting on the other settee.

Jongin picks up their halted conversation and replied, "That I'm gay, and I'm dating my assistant. Right?"

“Right. Glad you know it’s impossible. It won’t work Jongin, you know that. And I’m telling you this as a friend for 7 years. You should stop seeing Kyungsoo.”

Jongin stayed silent for the time being. Taking his time and planning thoroughly on how to incorporate all the thoughts in his head. He’s decided that he's done with this agency and he just wanted to stay with Kyungsoo. But some part of him was asking if that was what he really wanted. If he really wants to leave his dream. It’s a hard decision to make but he knew he had to face it soon.

“Just so you know, I won’t attend that stupid date.” That was all he could supply his manager. Jongin stands up and exit Junmeyon’s office, not giving him any opportunity to rebut.

It was already midnight when Jongin reached his apartment. He’s way too drunk and he was thankful for one of his staff who saw him at the bar and helped him reach his home in one piece. 

As he puts his weight on the couch and lazily sits, throwing his shoes sloppily, he heard someone coughed behind him. It was his assistant.

“So what happened? The director called me non-stop this afternoon, asking me where were you. I thought you.. Jongin?” Kyungsoo walks briskly towards him, he hadn’t noticed that Jongin was so wasted. He immediately helped him to properly sit down and assisted him on removing his coat and other garments.

Kyungsoo prepares warm water and Haejang-guk while he let's Jongin nap on the couch. He sets up the kitchen table once he's done and went to the living room. 

He soaked a clean towel on the bowl of warm water and gently wipe Jongin's face and arms. Kyungsoo then helped him to sit first, waiting for Jongin to be fully awake before he invites him to eat the soup he prepared.

"K.. Kyungsoo.. why are you.. here?" Jongin whispered, touching Kyungsoo's face as if checking if what's happening in front of him was real.

"Because I'm worried. You didn't pick up my calls and you didn't attend the shoot. But.. I think lets just can talk all about this later." 

Jongin pulled himself so he could sit up straight, his eyes never leaving Kyungsoo's.

"Hyung…" 

  
  


"Hm?"

Jongin leaned closely and kissed Kyungsoo softly. A chaste kiss. His hands cupping Kyungsoo's face.

Kyungsoo pulls himself first and rubs Jongin's cheek. With simple gestures, they seemed to understand each other. No words needed.

"Now you need to get up first, okay? The soup will get cold. Let me help you."

Kyungsoo assisted Jongin towards the kitchen. Jongin's hand resting on his shoulder while they walk side by side. He helped Jongin to settle on the chair then he serve the soup and pour it on the bowl in front of Jongin.

"Bet you haven't eaten yet. This will help you." He grabs the spoon and scooped the Haejang-guk and offers it to Jongin, feeding him like a child. Jongin opens his mouth and complied.

"I came here around nine, thought you'll be here but obviously you're not. So I decided to wait for you since I know you have no other place to stay except here." He declares as he continues to feed the drunk man in front of him.

"I'm… I'm sorry hyung. I thought I could do it. But…"

"But Junmyeon was right. Ain't it? Jongin you don't have to choose." Kyungsoo uttered, rubbing Jongin's back for reassurance.

"I don't want to be the person who cause you too much problem, Jongin. You know that right?" Kyungsoo finally seated beside him and stares at him as he gives his own thoughts.

"I know how much you love your job. Dancing is your passion, I don't want to take those away from you."

Jongin tilted his head, his eyes starting to get glassy. "But I love you too. And I don't want to.. to let you go."

"I know that too, Jongin." Kyungsoo breath heavily and stared at nothingness. He still tried to reply but it seems like words already left him. He averted his gaze back to Jongin and signals him to finish his food which Jongin obliges.

"Everything will be okay tomorrow morning, Nini. Trust me." He mumbled, his voice a bit shaky as if he's close to crying. Jongin just nodded and silently finish his food.

Jongin was already sleeping thirty minutes ago. Thanks to Kyungsoo, the idol was able to wash himself up and change on his sleeping clothes. Meanwhile, Kyungsoo was still in the kitchen, writing a few notes on his planner.

He was trying to keep silent, to make the sound of his muffled cry as low as possible. He knew this day would come, and since the very first day that he loved Jongin, he had already prepared himself. That this would happen sooner or later. 

All that he knows is that he loves Jongin so much and he is not selfish.

Jongin woke up the next day with the worst headache. He feels he's about to puke anytime. He was about to stand up so he could go to the bathroom when he noticed that he was alone on his bed. He rubbed and squinted his eyes, trying to look around. No signs of Kyungsoo.

He picks up his phone and checks the time: 12:14 PM. He scrolled through his notifications to check if there are messages from his assistant but all he saw was Kyungsoo’s messages from yesterday. 

Kyungsoo was asking where was he, what is he doing and all other messages that were full of worries. Yesterday. What the hell happened yesterday?

Even if he's dizzy, he managed to stand up and walk to the bathroom. He washed his face, and stares at his reflection in the mirror. He looks like a mess. 

He then returned to his bed and grabbed his phone, he presses Kyungsoo's number and called him. But after five attempts, he was unanswered. 

He doesn't have any schedule today and obviously, Kyungsoo should be at rest, too. But where is he? Why did he leave so soon without waking Jongin up?

Coffee. Jongin thinks to himself. That's what he needed right now and probably a late brunch. Jongin emerges immediately to the kitchen and checks his fridge. There are still left overs and Kyungsoo taught him how to heat them in the microwave. He'll survive with that.

As he waits for his coffee to be brewed, he sat on the dining table, then he noticed something foreign, something that was not part of the table's decoration. 

He found an envelope and a familiar box. The box of the the watch he gave Kyungsoo few months ago. 

He immediately took those into his hands and messily opens the envelope, tearing the upper part only to make sure the letter inside won't be torned.

~

_ Jongin, _

_ I have many things to thank you for but I'll make it brief and short. Thank you for coming into my life and helped me all throughout the way. I have loved you since the first day and I will love you 'til the end. But we both know what's the best thing to do. And the last thing I want to be is to become the destruction on your life. On your dreams. _

_ I know my place and I know where to stand. I will always be here, watching you from afar as you achieve all of your dreams. _

_ I left you with this letter but I have a whole ton of our memories with me. Please always choose to do the right thing. I love you, and I'll always will. _

  
  


_ Hoping only the best for my Nini. I love you. _

_ -Kyungsoo _

_~_

And just like that, he felt his whole world crashed into his hands. His chest tightened and constricted in pain as the tears started to fall endlessly like a dam on his eyes. His world. The only one he loved. He's now gone.

And what hurts him the most? Is that he is too cowardly to fight for him. He can’t stand up for him, for them. He can’t decide and fight for them that’s why Kyungsoo took care of it on his own way. He always says he'll find a way, but at the end, he doesn't. He can't. And he'll forever be living under the dark shadows of his dream.

-

In the past month, Jongin obliged diligently on what the agency told him to do. He attended the _ set-up _date and he's thankful that two weeks after the said event, the news that he and Irene already broke up resurface. 

  
Reasons of the break up were the usual, both idols were too busy to make their relationship work. Feedback from his fans and netizens are all positive, they all supported him throughout.

When everything seems like falling into their proper place and going back to the way they were, Jongin asked Junmyeon to hold a press conference and asked all the influential media company to participate. Junmyeon didn't even asked for a reason. He was settled at Jongin's statement that the idol just wanted to give a few teasers to heat up and hype his upcoming album. And Junmyeon can't say no to that.

Saturday morning. Jongin prepared well for this day. His gray hair neatly brushed up and styled. He's sporting his Gucci overalls. White polo with vertical blue stripes topped with yellow checkered sweater, detailed with small boxes colored with green, red and tan. Blue denim pants that compliments his upper garments and fully designed sneakers to match his whole look.

Today is the day of the press conference he asked for. This will be a big day.

He immediately settles on the center of the long table with a bottle of water in front of him the moment he emerges the conference hall. Beside him was Junmyeon and other assistant managers and crew. All excited and giddy on how would _Kai_ tease his fans. He always does this every album so everyone's used to it.

He clears his throat then takes a sip of water before checking his mic. He made sure each and every cameras, cellphones and recorders are all focused on him. And the moment he was satisfied with the silence and attention he got, he nods to himself and started.

"Good morning. I will be frank and direct to the point as I don't want to hassle and burden you all anymore." He paused, glancing at the face of his manager who looks a bit amused. He then checks again if he got all ears (and eyes) before he continued.

"I will be having an indefinite hiatus. There are no reassurance of me coming back to the industry. Thank you."

He stands up and bowed politely as he can. Letting the buzzing sounds from the reporters, the flashing cameras, Junmyeon's raging voice against his ears and everything in his surroundings turns to white noise. All he could hear was the thumping sounds of his heart. He doesn't take any second look when he decided to immediately get the lead out towards the exit. Junmyeon tried to catch up with him but with his long legs and obviously bigger strides, his manager failed. Instead, he stopped running towards Jongin and returned to the hall since he still need to fix the predicament that the idol had left.

-

Headlines of every news, talk shows, every internet articles, trending hashtags on all social media outlet and all the likes are about Kai. About Jongin. And how he just disappeared like a bubble that burst on that one fine morning.

Fans already had speculations that he's just preparing for his future and getting married soon. They even surmise that maybe Jongin and Irene didn't really broke up and that they really are still and very much together and planning to step up their relationship.

Other supposes that he was involved in drug trafficking or any heinous crimes and is trying to escape and clean his name before everything leaks out.

There are still weirder theories though. Jongin being trapped by the mafia or was hostaged by the rival agencies. Those conjectures that doesn't makes any sense at all.

But no one really knows where he is.

No one really knows what his plans are.

It's been two months since Jongin disappeared from the limelight. His album was halted, his fan meetings and commercials were all cancelled. Even Junmyeon doesn't know where he is. All that they released to the public is that Jongin is having his break and is currently on vacation somewhere in Europe which received positive reactions from the fans. At least their idol has time to rest and take a break. Surely, it won't take long for his fans to find out his whereabouts.

-

Monday morning. Kyungsoo was preparing himself. He needs a new job soon that pays as much as his previous job offered. After he resigned and left his spot from being the top idol’s assistant, he really did take his time to reflect and to think thoroughly of what his next plans would be.

He dressed nicely, black suit with dark blue tie partnered with black slacks and shoes, hair neatly brushed up. He decided he'll just give the corporate world a try this time. He had enough with the entertainment industry already.

As he was about to pack his things, he heard a soft knock on his door which halted him.

_ One. Two. Three knocks. _

He then observed if there really is someone out there or it's just some crazy kids making bad jokes at this early morning. 

But not even a minute long, the soft knock was replaced by a loud thud. He's not expecting someone, really. He knows its not yet his due date with the apartment fees so he's ascertain its not his landlady. He's also positive that he didn't order any food this morning. So, who could this be?

Kyungsoo hurriedly ran to the door before it even break because of the continual bang. He slides the chain so he could peek first before opening his door to some random strangers.

A familiar man with a familiar scent peeks in. The rays of the sun striking through his hair and bonnet even if he's fully covered.

A familiar man that he didn't expect that would come to see him.

"Jongin?" He questions as soon as he met the set of almond-eyes which were already staring at him. He quickly opens the door and let the man in. The idol was wearing a hoodie and sweatpants, his face covered with facemask and a bonnet which conceals his forehead so no one could even notice him.

"Soo.." He murmured before jumping into him and wrapping his arms around him, pulling him in a tight hug. 

"Jongin...." Kyungsoo tried to pull away but the idol didn't let him. He call him again, a little louder this time. "Jongin!"

"I miss you! Am I not allowed to hug you anymore?" Jongin murmured behind ears, whining when he pushes him away again, but this time, Jongin lets go of him.

"You're ruining my suit." Kyungsoo replied while straightening the invisible wrinkles on his clothes, arranging his tie since it got a little out of place. 

"What are you doing here? Where have you been? It's been.. three months." He questions, brow raised as he anticipate for the younger's reply. He didn't get any though. Jongin was just standing in front of him, giving him an over all.

"Wh.. Where are you going, hyung?" He replied instead, ignoring all the questions thrown at him. Kyungsoo sighed heavily. "I have an interview today." He answered truthfully and briefly.

Jongin gave him a quizzical look, eyes not leaving him as he crossed his hands on his chest. "You didn't wear any suit when you applied for me."

"That's because I applied as your assistant. But now is different since I don't want to be an assistant to any idol anymore. Now please excuse me while I pack my things, I don't want to be late." He uttered, leaving Jongin standing behind the door. 

"Are you still going even if I'm here?" Jongin questions, putting his shoes on the rack and making himself comfortable on Kyungsoo's couch.

"Unlike you, my bank account only has three digits on it as of now, and I need to work to pay my bills." He glares at him as he picks up his messenger bag. 

"You're leaving me here?" Jongin protest.

"No, because you're going out. Right now. Move." Kyungsoo orders, pulling Jongin so he could get up from the couch and leave.

"B..But I just got here. Can.. Can I just stay and wait for you? I really have nowhere to go to." He whines, pouting and giving him those puppy eyes. It should do the trick.

"I hate you." He sneers as he massaged his temples. "Fine, don't do anything ridiculous. I'll be back around lunch time." Jongin smiles sheepishly, his trick still works.

"But promise me, you need to tell me everything once I get back. Okay?" He clarifies to which Jongin nodded.

"Ofcourse, that's the main reason I'm here for. Plus, I really miss you hyung." He replied, standing up from the couch and attempting to pull Kyungsoo again for a hug before he leaves but the older man halted him, his hand pushing him away.

"My suit." he exclaims. "I'm going now, I'll see you later." Jongin nodded and watched as Kyungsoo leaves the house, locking the door behind him.

The interview went well. He had already met his future boss, and unlike Jongin, this one is really nice and jolly. Always trying to make his subordinates laugh. 

His first impression with Jongin was.. a bit off. Since Jongin was really bossy and pure of sass, good thing Kyungsoo knows how to bite back. He was able to tame the evilness from the idol.

True to his words, Kyungsoo got home around lunch time. He turns the knob and enters his apartment, finding Jongin all rolled up on his couch and taking a nap. He noticed that the idol was too tall and long for his small couch. Surely he'll get back pain if he sleeps longer.

Kyungsoo approaches him and leans down, poking him lightly in the arm. Jongin twitches, startled when he saw Kyungsoo's eyes staring at him.

"Why did you sleep here? You should've used my room." Kyungsoo uttered while removing his coat and hanging it near the dresser. 

"Privacy. I respect your privacy hyung. This is your house and I'm just a guest so…" Jongin shrugs as he slowly gets up and walks toward his ex-assistant. He doesn't even know what is their relationship now since they really lost contact a few months ago. All thanks to him and his dumb decisions in life. 

He stands behind Kyungsoo and hugs him, sensing if the elder will avoid him. When he noticed Kyungsoo didn't move, he decided to kiss him. A quick peck on his cheek.

"A guest kissing the owner on his first visit? What was that for?" He asked, turning around so he's now facing Jongin.

"I miss you. So much." Jongin murmurs as he leans closer to him and was about to cup his face but Kyungsoo pushed him away. Jongin frowns.

"Let me prepare something to eat. We need to talk later. A LONG TALK. So better be equipped." Kyungsoo emphasize and shrugs as he walks inside his room to change his clothes.

Garlic chicken, kimchi and stew, a simple lunch yet Jongin felt his heart was full. Kyungsoo still knows what he wants.

"Chicken! Thanks hyung." He utters, eyes glowing in appreciation. 

They sat in front of each other on Kyungsoo's dining table. It was not small but it's not as big as Jongin's of course, but they can manage.

They shared the meal in silence, a bit awkward and a bit comfortable. They _ were _ together for more than two years, silence is sometimes the best company if you're still contemplating on things you want to say.

"HOW ARE--" "How are--" They questioned in chorus, making them chuckle.

"You go first hyung." Jongin smiles and points at him to which Kyungsoo nodded and complied.

"How are you? What happened and why… why did you just went on hiatus? What about your career? What are you planning to do next?" Kyungsoo stumbles which gain a laughter from the idol.

"Woah, one at a time, hyung. We got plenty of time now." Jongin chortles. He took a deep breath first then he placed the utensils on the table since he's already done eating.

"First of all, I'm okay if you were talking about me physically. Mentally and emotionally, I sure am not." He reached for the glass of water in front of him and takes a sip before he continued.

"I realized I don't want to be their puppet anymore. It was on the day you… you left me. But I was a coward. It took me a month to act on everything. And it was hard. You wanna know why?" He raised one of his eyebrows and stares at Kyungsoo, waiting for him to fill out the answer on the hanging question but he got nothing to he just answered it himself.

"..because I was alone. I was.. scared. I got no one to hold on to. But then I think I need to man up. To stand on my own and to give them a piece of my mind." He ended.

Kyungsoo was silent, deliberating the new information he heard from the idol. Thinking on how would the things would be by now if he didn't leave. Maybe Jongin was still stuck on that agency and they're still hiding their not-so-official relationship.

"Guess that's a good outcome after leaving you. You learned something. At least you had the positive side of.. you know… our _ break up. _"

Jongin’s eyes widen on the word that he just uttered, his hand slamming the table, startling the man in front of him.. "Break up? Did we ever broke up? Coz I didn't get any news about that." 

Kyungsoo laughs, his heart shaped lips were visible again. He missed him so much. He missed everything about them.

"So how about you? How are you?" Jongin asked back since it's now his turn to question the older man.

"Honestly, it's humiliating. What happened to me the moment I closed your door, I really don't want to remember everything." He sighs. Jongin noticed the sadness in his eyes so he reached for his hand that was resting on the table and gently rubs it. 

"You don't need to tell me now if you're not ready. It's okay."

"No, I'm okay now so I think I can finally tell you.." 

"...my life was a living hell. The night after that, I drown myself with all the alcohol my body could take. I wasn't able to go home that night, I slept in front of the bar. Can you believe that? I woke up when an old man taps me and give me a piece of his bread. He thought I was homeless." He laughs desperately.

"Everyday, I see you. In the news, magazines, social media, literally everywhere! And you know it's so unfair. Wanna know why?" He swallows the big lump resting on his throat. "Coz I always see you, yet you can't _see_ me. You can't see the pain I was going through but then again I was the one who left so, basically, I deserve it." He falls silent, his head bowed down.

Jongin stands and walks to him, seating on the vacant chair beside him "I'm sorry, I really didn't know. I should've done it all quickly. I'm sorry you need to feel that. I'm coward and stupid and-"

Kyungsoo cuts him off, placing his hand on Jongin's mouth. "Shut up. It's my fault. I left you alone. But I'm so proud of you because you made a big decision by yourself." Jongin was about to protest again that it's not Kyungsoo's fault but the man glares at him. "If you insist again that it's your fault, you'll gonna wash all the dishes every time for your whole stay in my apartment."

And that was how Kyungsoo ended up on the couch, lying and enjoying a pack of junk food in his hand and a beer on the other while Jongin, well, washing all the dishes in the sink.

Tonight, they just decided to drink and watch a few series they need to catch up. A celebration? Maybe. Because they missed each other so much and being together after months without contact is really worth celebrating for.

They had a fair share of what happened in their lives for the time they were away from each other. Jongin tells him everything in detail on how he pissed off Junmyeon everyday. Sometimes being overboard to the point that he'll call him even if it’s his rest day just to ask Jumyeon to get him a coffee from his favorite coffee shop.

Kyungsoo told him every little thing he did (or did not) do during those miserable days of his life, too. Sometimes he doesn't eat for a day, or sleep, sometimes he doesn't eat _ and _ sleep at all. Just getting drunk and wasted which makes Jongin really upset and melancholy.

It was nearing midnight and they had a too few many drinks. The movie playing on the television becomes a white noise because the moment they started _ watching_, they really didn't watch. At all. 

They spend the whole night talking for the first few minutes then kissing on the next hour. They exhaust all the remaining hours by making out, sloppy and wet kisses surrounding Kyungsoo's living room.

Jongin was sitting on the couch when Kyungsoo scoots beside him, playing with his ears at first then sucking the skin beneath his jaw. 

  
Jongin's breath hitched by Kyungsoo's aggressive move, but then he's borderline tipsy so he already get what the older man wants them to _do._

His lips spread love bites all over Kyungsoo’s neck, and he mewls softly. Then he latch his mouth into Kyungsoo's, nibbling his lower lip. Kyungsoo smothers his lips, his tongue darting inside Jongin’s mouth, skillfully playing with their tongues.

He tried to stop himself from touching Kyungsoo at first but when it's all hot and he can only feel Kyungsoo's warm breath against his lips, Jongin gave in. He was about to pull from the kiss and attemps to remove Kyungsoo's clothes when he suddenly felt fingers trailing along his waistband. Kyungsoo was trying to pull down his sweatpants but since they're seated, he can't. 

Jongin immediately pulls himself to stand up, stretching his arm so Kyungsoo could grab into him. He then attacked Kyungsoo's swollen lips and lifts him, the older man's feet clinging on his waist. He walked towards the room, hitting a few things on the way which he doesn't care for now.

He lays Kyungsoo to bed gently, lips never detaching from the wet and sloppy kiss. This time, he was the one to pull Kyungsoo's pants first, all the way to the ground together with his boxers in one go.

Kyungsoo's crotch flies open on Jongin's face, getting a chuckle from the idol. "Wow, you missed me, huh?" He teased as he slowly lowered his head down. Leaving wet trail of kisses from Kyungsoo's stomach, sucking a bit of a skin there.

He pulls up and crawls lower, now he's face to face with Kyungsoo's bum. He gave it a squeeze while teasing Kyungsoo's hole with his thumb.

"Jongin.. _ Fuck _." Kyungsoo whispers, arching his back and asking for more friction.

"You got lube here?" Jongin questions as his lips makes its way towards Kyungsoo's entrance. His tongue swirling around it while poking the hole with his thumb making Kyungsoo's cock leak in precum. 

"F..first drawer." Kyungsoo points out stuttering. Jongin reached for it in no time after leaving a full lick on the older man's aching hole. 

Jongin pours on the lube messily on his slick fingers and a few on Kyungsoo's entrance. He teases him for the last time before finally giving him a first digit.

"Fuck.." Kyungsoo moans loudly, enough for Jongin's cock to twitch beneath his sweatpants. Kyungsoo tossed his head back, feeling the heat burning his whole body up. "Jongin, please." He begged to which the idol immediately complied, pressing his second finger, scissoring him open.

He adds his third finger soon, fucking Kyungsoo with only his slick and long fingers, making sure he could hit his prostate. 

Kyungsoo's moans were louder as accelerate the pace. He kisses Kyungsoo's thighs and giving his ass a squeeze with his free hand. 

"Jongin… stop. Just.. just fuck me already." Kyungsoo exhorts making Jongin chuckle. "Aggressive as always, I see." He replied.

"You've never teased me like this before. Why are you doing this now?" Kyungsoo responded as he watched Jongin undress in front of him, pulling his sweatpants haphazardly, hitting the floor directly.

"I just… you know. I miss you so much I want to make this one memorable." He cooed as he leaned down, catching Kyungsoo's swollen lips again on a soft and languid kiss.

Jongin lubes himself before he aligns his cock on Kyungsoo's rim. He plunges in slowly, the tip of his crotch hitting Kyungsoo's entrance as he works his mouth and tongue against Kyungsoo, hot and heavy to distract him from the burn.

He started on a slow pace, enjoying how Kyungsoo's body accommodate him with each snap of his hips. Kyungsoo lets out little whimpers before placing his ankle on the small of Jongin's back, tugging him to move faster. Deeper.

Jongin is quick to comply, as his thrusts are now deeper and faster. Skin slapping against skin, he's hitting that spot where Kyungsoo twitched and moaned loudly. He hits it again and again, rocking him harshly against the mattress while nipping on the sensitive spot on Kyungsoo's neck.

"Jongin!" With one last thrust, both of them hits pure bliss. Kyungsoo was full of Jongin's cum while he has a handful of his own on his stomach and chest.

They showered right after and changed their clothes. Kyungsoo lended a few of his sleepwears to Jongin who looks really funny right now. 

He's wearing a sky blue pair of pyjamas, pants are too short, hanging in between his knees and ankles. As for the shirt, well it didn't fit at all so Jongin just decided to sleep topless that night.

They settle side by side on the bed, Jongin facing Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo facing the ceiling.

"So, what's your plan now?" Kyungsoo moved his head to the right, staring right through Jongin's almond eyes.

"You still remember I said I love you right?" He sighed. Kyungsoo scoots closer to cup his cheeks. "And you know I will love you no matter what Nini. I think I've made it clear in the letter."

"Yeah, that one too. Honestly Hyung, I'm really scared. But can you please hold my hand and never let go? I need to face them all soon and I don't think I can do it alone this time." Jongin pleaded, placing his hand on Kyungsoo's waist. 

Kyungsoo puts his hand on top of Jongin's, "I'll be with you this time Nini, and I will never leave."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait. I really had a hard time the past few days but everything's a bit better now.
> 
> This one is bit cringy I'm so sorry! I also tried to add another smut coz why not? :p 
> 
> Anyways, I just submitted the first check-in of the fics to UTKJI Fest!! Hope you'll enjoy those too! All fics will be out by Feb 2020!! 
> 
> Still got a few WIP fics on my files and will try to finish them one at a time.  
I would also love to see your feedbacks and comments, I always reply :)
> 
> You may also talk to me on twitter: @jonginniesprout
> 
>   
Hope you like this update! See you soon. :)  
Thank you so so much!!


	4. Chapter 4

He enjoyed this. Spending time at Kyungsoo's apartment for the past month and doing almost nothing aside from helping his boyfriend to maintain the cleanliness of the house. Yes, Jongin misses his unit as much, his bed and huge TV, but none of those can replace the smile he sees every time Kyungsoo arrives home from work, beaming a heart-shaped smile on his lips. An instant shot of endorphins, if he must say.

It's been a month already since he decided to stick up with Kyungsoo in his tiny apartment. This way, the media people won't be able to find him. But he’s also aware that anytime soon, they will bug Kyungsoo knowing that the man was he’s ever trusted assistant. He’s ascertain that once they found out about their current situation, everything will just get worse. So he had already made up his mind to act on it and to decide soon. Is he leaving the industry permanently or is he coming back? He contemplates.

His contract with Label SM will end next weekend. He already got a handful of news from SNS, and Naver articles and he's currently on top search. He's a hundred and twelve percent sure that media reporters will be everywhere outside the agency's office that day and will probably wait for him to show up should he wish to renew.

The agency is bugging him from time to time alongside with Junmyeon on the very first day he decided to open his phone. His notifications were blasting with calls and text messages. He sighed. It was supposed to be a good day since it's Friday. Kyungsoo goes home early every Friday since his schedule is until lunch time only. Kyungsoo even planned on a late lunch date with him that day.

As the door clicks, he immediately perks up and leaves his phone on the table beside the couch. He walked towards the door, greeting Kyungsoo and giving him a peck on his lips. This was part of their everyday routine. Jongin welcoming Kyungsoo once he got home and peppering him with kisses. But this time it feels different and Kyungsoo noticed it too.

"What's wrong?" He asked patting the small of Jongin's back. The younger attaches himself to Kyungsoo like a koala. Chin resting on his shoulder, hands wrapped around his tiny waist for two or so minutes. He stayed silent for a while, feeling the warmth and comfort that his boyfriend is giving him. 

Jongin's phone rang non stop a few moments after, cutting them off from their _ silent _conversation. "Aren't you gonna pick that up?" Kyungsoo questions, pulling out from the hug and staring at Jongin. He noticed that tears have already started to form in his eyes.

"That's just Junmyeon. He keeps on bugging me since this morning." Jongin deadpans.

  
"Oh," was all Kyungsoo could ever reply. He remembered that it's already Friday and tomorrow was the day the whole nation was waiting for. If Kai is going to return or not. No one else, aside from him, knows where _Kai_ is.

"So what's your plan?" Kyungsoo inquires as he invite Jongin to sit on the couch. They settled comfortably beside each other. 

"I'm not gonna sign up for them again, that's all I'm sure of."

"You… you're not coming back? What about your career?" Kyungsoo asked worriedly. 

"I already have a plan in mind but it involves you. I know you have a fair amount of contacts with the media and I need you to help me."

"What do you want me to do?" 

"Hm, let's eat first hyung. I'm starving. Then let's drop by the grocery store. We're running out of stocks." Jongin chides, avoiding the conversation for now. He still needs to smoothen his plan a bit. Maybe tonight, it will all be plain sailing.

-

Kyungsoo had no idea that the first thing he needs to do based on Jongin's _plan_ is to resign. He just started working for that company one month ago. He can't really say he _loves_ his job. It pays well, just enough to cover his daily and monthly expenses plus some additional to support his mother needs. But it's not as big as Jongin or his agency pays him. Well, he knows Jongin is the reason for the sudden increase in his pay six months after he had started but he deserved that raise very well. He really had a hard time when he first met the hard-headed idol.

"Why would I resign? You want me to be your assistant again? Jongin, I think I made it clear to you that I really don't want to be involved anymore." He tried to reason out.

Jongin shrugged, sloppily pulling his legs on the couch so he’s now on indian style position and messily eats his popcorn from the bowl. It's Saturday and that means movie night. He turned off his phone before he slept last night, knowing how persistent his manager and agency are, he's positive that they will do everything just for him to sign up and renew his contract again. Sure, he's the number 1 trending topic right now, but he couldn't care less.

"Just.. trust me on this one hyung. Please?" He pleaded using the looks Kyungsoo cannot reject. 

Kyungsoo just rolled his eyes and crossed his arms on his chest. "I hate you. So much."

"I love you too, Soo. You're the best." Jongin leans to him and kisses his cheek. A victorious grin on his face.

Kyungsoo filed for his resignation the next work day. Feeling sorry for Chanyeol, his boss, who's always been kind and understanding towards him. His workmates whom he got acquainted already. He really liked it there. It's peaceful unlike the entertainment industry. He really didn't want to leave even if the work was repetitive and sometimes boring. Paper works, reports, presentations. Repeat. 

Kyungsoo would be lying if he says he didn’t miss his job as the idol’s assistant. Aside from being with Jongin most of the time, he's exposed to different kinds of professionalism. Every project is a challenge. Magazine photoshoot, concert, album, everything adds up in his experience and he actually liked it. Another reason for him to stay in that career for the last two years.

But until today, Jongin haven't mentioned any of his plans to him yet. He mental notes that if he's going to be his assistant again, he will request for a good raise after all the hardships he went through.

Next thing Jongin asked him to do is to provide a list of people that have a huge influence in the agency. Jongin mentioned that he only needs the name, contact details and their addresses and he will be the one to do the negotiation. Weird, but he didn't ask further after he hands him the list.

The next days, Jongin spent most of it outside with Sehun since he can't use his personal car. Everyone is too familiar with it and he doesn't want his plan to be busted when it hasn't even started yet. 

Jongin already told Sehun about their situation and they’re confident that he will never speak to anyone about it. That man hates socializing the most. It’s enough of a reason to trust him aside from the fact that he’s Jongin’s best friend. 

Kyungsoo still doesn't have any idea on what would happen next.

-

It's still a bit early today when Kyungsoo checks the time: three o'clock in the afternoon. It's way too early compared to the previous days where Jongin arrives between seven to ten in the evening.

Jongin just got home from some place Kyungsoo doesn't know. The younger just told him that he needs to meet up with some old friends and it's all part of his plan or whatever.

"Patience, hyung. Next month. I'll tell you all next month but trust me. Everything's going the way I planned." He moves closer to Kyungsoo and kisses him on his temple.

Jongin bought a new phone earlier that day, with a new number of course. He needs to start to face all of them now, it's been too long. His former agency, the media and of course, the one who put him where he is right now. His fans. They deserve every explanation since they were always there for him no matter what happened.

He tried scrolling up through some news articles, checking if there are any news about him and if someone already saw him since he's going out frequently now. He still wears a mask and cap though. Always being careful since he doesn't want to stir and feed the media wrong information.

To his surprise, the news were about his ex-manager, Junmyeon, who has announced that he will depart from Label SM since he cannot imagine molding another idol aside from Kai.

With this new information, Jongin sighed. Truly, Junmyeon was really irksome during the last months especially when he discovered what's going on between him and his assistant. But his manager had been good to him throughout those years. He believed in Jongin's talent since day one. And he helped him reach wherever he is right now. He felt dejected wasting all those fruitful years. If only Junmyeon just supported him and Kyungsoo in silent instead of going against it, this won't end like this.

A soft knock on the door startled the both of them. And since Kyungsoo was busy preparing for their meal tonight, Jongin was the one who volunteered to open the door. 

He grabs his baseball cap and mask, making sure whoever it is would not recognize him.

He unlocks the chain first so he could peek who was on the other side. When he saw the face of the man, his eyes opened wide in shock. He still doesn't know whether he's going to let him in or just push him away. 

Kyungsoo noticed that Jongin was just standing behind the door like a rock so he decided to walk near him and check who was the one knocking.

"It's.. its Jun." Jongin whispered which leaves Kyungsoo in shock too. "What should we do hyung?" Jongin gave him a worrisome look.

"We're not criminals Jongin. Just let him in. At least he's alone." Kyungsoo moved forward so Jongin stepped aside as the older man opens the door, letting their visitor enter.

"Hi Junmyeon, it's been a long time." Kyungsoo wiped his hands first on his apron since its wet from all the preparation he's doing inside the kitchen. He offers his hand to Junmyeon to shake which was gladly received by the manager. 

"Hey, Kyungsoo. Yes, it's been really a while. Hi Jongin." Junmyeon responded, peeking behind Kyungsoo's shoulder to see the idol. Jongin just gave him a soft smile and a single nod as an acknowledgement. 

They invited him inside to sit on the couch and offered him something to drink and some snacks. The three of them were mostly silent for the time being aside from Junmyeon's minimal remarks regarding Kyungsoo's apartment. 

When they noticed that they had nothing to talk to anymore, Jongin finally decided to clear everything up and to know what is the purpose of his visit.

"I've read about the article Jun." Jongin started as he sat up straight, giving all his attention to his former manager.

"Yeah. Actually, I've been trying to call you the past few days. I was about to tell you to not to renew your contract. But you didn't answer. Well I think I deserve it." Junmyeon replied which got him a confused look from the idol.

"The moment you announced that you're going hiatus, I started looking for other jobs. And thankfully, I got a new one." He continued, a smile creeping on his face. Jongin nodded and gestured him to go on.

Junmyeon takes a few sip on his glass of juice before facing Jongin again. "I already knew you were here. Aside from my place and Sehun's, you got nowhere else to stay aside Kyungsoo's." Jongin stumbles from his seat, leaning closer to Junmyeon and checking if he really does heard him right.

"You knew I'm here? Then why didn't you grab me from here and told the media and the management on my whereabouts?" Jongin questions, his brows furrowed.

"I'm not an asshole. We've been together for seven years. I know what I did the past months were really ridiculous and I'm… I'm really sorry. I was just trying to protect you and your career since I know you've worked hard for it. For all of these." Junmyeon explained.

Jongin breathes heavily, still keeping an eye contact with his manager. Now he's hearing the truth. He's still thankful though, that Junmyeon didn't ruined him even if he does know where he and Kyungsoo are. But he still deliberates, weighing if he should trust his words just like that.  
  


"I understand that you were just protecting me. But, you could've just let me handle it." Jongin replied, giving him an exasperated look.

"Look Jongin, I came here to apologize and.." He paused, breaking his gaze with the idol.

"And what?"

Junmyeon heaved a deep sigh before he continued, "and to say goodbye. I'm leaving tomorrow for New York. I guess you deserve a formal apology and a farewell from me." 

Jongin gave him a quizzical look, tilting his head while his eyebrows raised. "What are you going to do in New York?" 

"I told you I got the job right? I'll be staying there. For good." He answered.

They stayed silent for a few minutes. Both of them can't find enough words to reciprocate with each other. 

Junmyeon faced Kyungsoo who was sitting on the couch next to him. He tapped his shoulder to get his attention and murmured, "I'm sorry, too, Kyungsoo. For everything. I really am." He turns to Jongin again, the idol is now frowning.

"I don't expect you two to forgive me soon, but I just wanted you to know that I am sincere and I am concerned." He patted Jongin's shoulder and smiled, "I know I taught you enough. I trust you and I know you can handle this. And just so you know, I adore your relationship. I may not show it before but I think you two make a good couple." He jokes, getting a smack on his thigh from Jongin.

"I mean, I can't believe anyone was able to tame the wild, the badass Kim Jongin. Even I can't make you change like that."

They laugh for a while, reminiscing those days when Kyungsoo was not giving a shit about Jongin and his attitude. Junmyeon also shared a thing or two on how can Jongin come back with less damage and how to handle and calm the media.

It was nearing evening and they had invited Junmyeon to stay for dinner. However, he had to decline, reasoning that he still need to pack his things since he got an early flight tomorrow.

"Thank you Jun. I really appreciate what you did. You know you're my favorite manager right?" Jongin utters as he hugged Junmyeon. 

"You don't have any other manager beside me you fool. And I think that would change soon. Your favorite manager would change next month." Junmyeon replied, nudging his head towards the kitchen where Kyungsoo is. 

"Yeah, but don't tell anyone about it okay? I haven't even told him about that."

Jongin really needed a few help and advice so he shared his plan with Junmyeon, knowing he would absolutely help him. He was thankful enough that finally, the misunderstandings between them are cleared.

"So, see you on you U.S. tour, Kai?" He teases, giving out a small smirk. 

Jongin chortles as he opens the door for him. "Take care, Jun, and always keep in touch. I will be the one to call and bug you this time." 

"Sure. Anytime Jongin. It was a pleasure working with you for all those years. I learned a lot. Bye Jongin, Bye Soo!" He shouted so Kyungsoo could hear him from the dining area. He had tears forming on his eyes and Jongin noticed that too, since he himself is close to crying at this point.

Junmyeon waved his hand for the last time before he entered his car and drive away. 

  
  


-

The day has come and that whatever he planned was finally smooth sailing. 

Just like what he had promised Kyungsoo, today is the day that he'll finally reveal his master plan. Aside from Junmyeon, only Sehun knows all about it.

"Really hope everything will turn out fine Jongin." Sehun muttered as he maneuvers the car and stopped right in front of Kyungsoo's apartment. It's almost ten in the evening and Jongin is sure that Kyungsoo is already worried about him. 

"I hope so too. And I really wish Kyungsoo would agree. I mean, I decided on everything without asking him." Jongin replied anxiously. 

Sehun hits the break and pulls the hand break so he could continue chatting with his friend. "I'm sure he will. He loves you and you know that. Now go inside and tell him everything."

"Come to think of it Sehunnie, you're not that busy these days. Do you want to be my assistant? I'm sure it will take me a long time to find another one." He coys, getting a smack on his arms from Sehun.

"You've already made me your personal driver the past few weeks Jongin. And besides, my looks can pass as an idol too. I may be your biggest rival." Sehun jokes and they both fall in a loud guffaw.

"I'll see you then Sehun. I'm really thankful I got you."

"Stop the drama Jongin. Just invest in my company once you have enough resources." Sehun shrugs as he unlocked the doors from the central control.

Jongin give him a soft smile before he alights the car and Sehun waved back. He closed the door then his friend steers away.

He was about to knock on the door, but to his surprise, it instantly opened and his boyfriend was standing in front of him. Kyungsoo tiptoes and immediately kissed him square on his lips.

"W...Wow. What was that for?" Jongin questions as his hands rub Kyungsoo cheeks.

"Welcome home kiss I guess? Was that Sehun? Why didn't you invite him for dinner?" Kyungsoo turns around to open the door, letting Jongin enter first before him. 

"He's in a hurry, he said he needs to attend a meeting tomorrow morning." Jongin declares. He sets himself on the couch, smelling something pleasant coming from the kitchen. "You cooked, hyung? Don't tell me you haven't eaten dinner yet?"

Kyungsoo sits beside him, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. "I've waited for you." He says, eyes glued on the floor. Jongin scoots beside him, wrapping his arms on his shoulder and kissed him on his temple. "You're extra sweet today Soo, why is that?"

"I don't know. I felt like something's about to happen and…" He paused, cupping Jongin's face, "..and I'm afraid I might lose you again." Jongin sighs as he stares at him, he knows how scared Kyungsoo feels right now. He pulled Kyungsoo closer and kissed him on the lips, a chaste kiss giving Kyungsoo reassurance.

"Something big will happen hyung, and we're gonna do it together." Kyungsoo smiled hesitantly before he returned his gaze on the floor again. They were left with silence as their company.

Jongin needs to break the ice now, he can't wait for tomorrow to talk about it with Kyungsoo. So he stands up from the couch, offering his hand to Kyungsoo so he could follow him. "Let me see what did you cook today." He uttered as they walk towards the kitchen, hand in hand, fingers intertwined.

Kyungsoo seems a bit comfortable now after they finished their super late dinner. Jongin already washed himself up and was waiting for him in the bedroom. He followed the idol after making sure that everything was clean in his kitchen and he's done with washing up too. He sat down on his side of the bed. He noticed Jongin was already staring at him, looking nervous and anxious.

"You okay, Babe?" He questions, brushing the soft locks of Jongin's damp hair.

Jongin heaved a deep sigh before he started, staring at Kyungsoo's doe eyes. "We're going to have a long talk tonight, make sure you won't sleep hyung, okay?" Kyungsoo nods and gestures for him to start.

-

A month has already passed quickly, and this was all they've waited for. It's eight in the morning and both of them are dressed up nicely.

Jongin finally got the chance to use his car again, thanks to his ever trusted bestfriend - Sehun, who picked it up a week ago from his apartment.

Today, everything will change. Whether they get positive or negative response, he couldn't care less, as long as Kyungsoo is right beside him, everything will be okay.

They arrived in the conference hall, a place quite familiar with Jongin since this is the same hall he announced his hiatus almost six months ago. 

This is his first public appearance after all those months and he made sure all the media that were present during his last press conference are all in attendance.

Like the usual, he settles on the middle of the long table, but this time, he only got Kyungsoo and Sehun beside him. He doesn't have enough staff yet since all of them were from Label SM. He thinks he’ll take care of it after this event.

He doesn't have Junmyeon beside him who'll handle everything if ever something went wrong. This is a big step for him, a big decision to make but Kyungsoo reassures him that he could help, maybe not as much as Junmyeon since he's technically new in the field, but he got a diverse amount of experience from the past years he stayed and observed the idol's ex-manager.

Jongin clears his throat once, and all the attention was on him. Cameras, lights, video recorders, all are prepared to capture whatever is the main reason the idol have called for them.

He looked at Kyungsoo first like getting permission if he could start and Kyungsoo nodded. He smiled nervously before turning his face towards the media.

"I know this is sudden and I know I owe everyone an apology for the disappearance, especially my fans." Camera flashes continuously, the reporters are still silent and waiting for him to go on.

"I am planning to return to the industry under a different management." The media started buzzing around, throwing a lot of questions but he just smiled, more confident this time, as he continues, "For the time I wasn't around, I was able to make contact with a few people who helped me and encouraged me. I took time during my hiatus to think about how things should go and what the future awaits for me and my career. Those months gave me enough time to take in consideration all the advice they've given me. They also guided and directed me on how I could handle this decision on my own. That’s why I am here now." He paused, taking a deep breath. It has finally started. 

"I have established my own agency named 2K Entertainment. Starting today, I will promote under the said label and I would really hope that you could still continue to support me as much as before. I am sincerely apologizing to my fans who were always there for me. I am really sorry for leaving you. I am back with a greater version of myself and I will offer more of my talent and skills for the years to come." He stands up and gives the most respectful bow towards the media.

"Before we start with the interview which I know many of you will question about my relationship status, I am going to give you my statement before hand." Kyungsoo kicked him under the table, silently asking him _ 'What the hell is this, this is not part of the plan!' _ when they're eyes met. He chortles, winking at Kyungsoo who looks like he's about to hit Jongin with anything he could grab at the moment. 

Jongin turns his gaze back at the cameras and continued, "As you can see, Junmyeon is not around to be my manager anymore so I got a replacement. This man right here, Mr. Doh Kyungsoo, is my new manager." The reporters nodded, typing every word on his statement on their tablets.

Jongin grabs Kyungsoo's hand, the latter was about to protest and was about to pull from Jongin's grasp but the idol holds him tighter, giving him an affectionate smile. Kyungsoo's eyes were as big as saucers, his face beet-red. He can't even face the reporerts, he's just bowed down, staring at the floor.

"My new manager happens to be my partner also. And we've been together for a long time but we won't give any details about that anymore." He finally let go of Kyungsoo's hand as he placed both of his on the table. He gives one final smile before he gestures the reporters to start their questions.

The conference was successful and they went straight to Kyungsoo's apartment that night. He's excited and giddy the whole day but Kyungsoo was silent, giving him the cold treatment. 

As they finally rest down on the couch, he tugged Kyungsoo closer and hugged him as tight as he could. Then he pulled away and stared at him, tilting his head as he questions, "What's wrong? Are you mad at me?" 

Kyungsoo sighs, sitting up straight on the sofa and avoiding Jongin's eyes. "That's not part of the plan, Jongin. You didn't tell me you're going to.." He paused when Jongin stands up and then sit on the carpet on the floor so they are now face to face. 

"That I'm in love with my assistant-turns-manager? I can't see any reason why not." He argues, making no room for Kyungsoo to make excuses but he still remained silent so Jongin grabbed opportunity to continue.

"We've been hiding since forever, Soo and I think it's about time. No more hiding, okay?" He brushed Kyungsoo's cheeks gently, reassuring him that everything will be fine, and finally, Kyungsoo smiled. 

"Thank you Jongin, I was just scared it might affect you and your career."

"I know I can't please everybody and I'm sure a lot of my fans will leave me but as long as I have you, it's enough. You said you're my number 1 fan right? Then I will never stop performing until my last fan leaves me." He coos, making a single tear drop from Kyungsoo's glassy eyes.

Jongin stands up and pulls Kyungsoo yet again for another warm hug, rubbing his back and whispering comforting words. Kyungsoo pulled back first this time and questions the younger man, "So are you still staying here in my apartment now that _Kai_ is back?" Jongin chuckles at the nickname, he hadn't heard it for a long time.

"Well, about that, I think I'm gonna move back to my unit." He answered. Kyungsoo frowns a bit and nodded, "Of course you should. I'll help you pack your th--"

"And I'm taking you with me." He interrupts Kyungsoo who looked like he was about to protest but Jongin was quick, placing a finger on Kyungsoo's lips before he continued, "And I'm not taking 'no' for an answer." Jongin ended, giving him a smug look, the same look he used when he first met Kyungsoo as his assistant. Kyungsoo pinched him on his side. They both laughed until Kyungsoo decided that they should call it a day. Starting tomorrow, everything will change. And Kyungsoo wants his last day of intimacy with Jongin in his little apartment becomes memorable.

-

Fans and netizens accepted him and he got a positive feedback from them. Though there are still hateful comments and responses, they didn't mind them at all. What's important is that he's back on doing what he loves the most and he got Kyungsoo on his side.

They've already released the image teaser of his upcoming album titled_ 'Confession'_, wherein Jongin wrote the title song himself which even Kyungsoo have no idea since Jongin didn't let him read the lyrics. It's one of his surprises, he says, so Kyungsoo didn't bugged him anymore.

Pre-order sales gave them a shock as it rockets up to 500 thousand orders, worldwide. This is by far his most successful album since his debut. His usual album sales were averaging from 200 to 300 thousand, but this is his first time having half a million and the album wasn't even released yet.

It's set to release the physical and digital album next week. It was also the same day of his comeback concert titled _ 'Time for Kai'. _ He will perform his old songs and of course, the ones in his album for the very first time. 

_ Time for Kai in Seoul _ will be the first stop. The concert is plotted for 2 weekends. He will perform from Friday to Sunday for two weeks. 

Even if they were tight on time, they've successfully got themselves their own crews and assistants. Others were Jongin's previous staff who had also left his previous label and decided to join him instead. He was glad he met familiar faces and also happy to greet the new ones. Kyungsoo handles most of them, of course. Being the idol's manager _and _personal assistant is a tough job. Jongin insisted that he doesn't need an assistant anymore and if Kyungsoo would still insist that, Jongin suggested that they’ll just hire a new one, but obviously, Kyungsoo declined. He’s confident Jongin will never leave him but he knows how close the personal assistant’s get to the idol, in terms of body contact, and he would never risk to make another obstacle in their relationship. So Kyungsoo just decided to manage his tasks and time to do both functions effectively.

Today marks the first day of his concert tour and the release of his album. His concept was, of course, pop, but he added a few personal touch on his performance. For his title song _ Confession, _ which is also the album title, he did the choreography on his own too and just seeked for guidance of other senior choreographers. Jongin declares that he really wants to express himself and his feelings through his dance and the song's lyrics.

_"1..2.3.. KAIGHTING!!" _Kai and the whole members of the crew, including his manager, cheered loudly on the back stage. In ten minutes, Kai is definitely back. Performing and owning the stage, giving his fans a better version of him. He's nervous but he's more excited.

The first two hours of the concert ended quickly and fans were cheering outside lively, asking him for an encore stage. He doesn't perform his latest song yet so everyone is still anticipating. Including Kyungsoo.

"Remember that I still hate you for not letting me read the lyrics and watch when you practiced." Kyungsoo exclaims while helping Jongin put on his costume for the encore stage.

Jongin doesn't wear much, literally. Just black pants and black sleeveless blazer with three buttons and a cap. Nothing else. Almost revealing his toned body underneath.

"This doesn't make sense, who designed this costume? Might as well remove it at all." Kyungsoo muttered, tugging the blazer that Jongin was wearing.

"Oh, better watch the performance babe. You'll see." he teases, his finger lingers on Kyungsoo's lower lip for a few seconds before he ran back to the stage, preparing for his encore.

-

Kyungsoo watches from the monitor, Kai was standing on the center with a smirk on his face while the song's intro plays. 

_ I just wanna know ya _

_ Time for Confession _

_ Time for Confession _

_ Hit yourself up _

_ It's your time for Confession _

The first part of the song plays, Kai gracefully moves in his own trance. Kyungsoo's gaze not leaving the monitor in front of him, his hand was on his chest, trying to calm his pounding heart. He looks good, he will always will and Kyungsoo is just proud of him.

_ Unpredictably dense poker face _

_ The elegance that's flowing through your whole body _

_ Monday to Friday _

_ No exit, No way _

_ Falling more and more _

_ Instead of Lies _

_ More clear facts _

_ Take off the unnecessary things that locked in your ego _

_ The feelings that changed you _

_ More deep secrets _

_ CONFESS it all to me _

Kai's cap fell from his head due to immense dancing, revealing his face. The same face that Kyungsoo loved so dearly for almost three years now.

Kyungsoo's heart clenched and he didn't noticed that a single drop of tear already made its way on his cheeks. The song was about him. He knows it. Feels it. That he should not be in fear of their relationship anymore. Jongin did everything, just for him.

_ Your voice is deeper than the night's darkness _

_ A dark gaze that looks like it's searching for something _

_ That's it , That's all _

_ The body that's getting weaker _

_ I still want it _

_ All I want is your love _

Kyungsoo wasn't able to stop his tears. The song is pop but he looks like a fool crying his eyes out in front of the monitor, sniffing and still trying to be more silent as he didn't want anyone to notice him. He's just focused on Jongin. On Kai. His every movement and every line he uttered. 

_ Slowly wake up, It's time to let go of everything _

_ Don't worry you don't need makeup, _

_ Just put your head up and come closer _

_ Feel my breath before your eyes _

_ As we get closer (Want More) _

_ Know what I'm saying , You know what I'm saying _

The first day of the concert ended successfully. The crowd chants his name until all the lights opened. They missed him. And Jongin is thankful that after all what happened, many of them didn't leave. He still can't believe that all of the 6-days scheduled concert was sold out. He’s looking forward to the next concert days, he’s certain of that.

He exits the backstage after bowing and thanking his fans for coming, telling them that he will see them again tomorrow. A few members of the crew handed him towels and a bottle of water which he gladly accepts as he bows and thank them in reply. 

Just like before, he politely give his thanks to everyone. For their efforts and help because Jongin really owes them a lot.

As he went back to his dressing room, knowing where most of the crew stays, he was startled. He expected the room to be full but to his surprise, only his manager was inside.

"Soo?" He questions as he walks nearer, going towards the direction of the older man. Kyungsoo's eyes were red and swollen, like he had just finished a whole series of a sad ending Korean drama.

He hurriedly ran and hugged him, enveloping the smaller man in his strong arms. 

"What's wrong? What happened?" He asked worriedly. Kyungsoo just stayed silent and Jongin could feel his hiccups on his chest. He pulled Kyungsoo away to take a look on his face and eyes. 

"I assumed you watched it. Did you like it?" He smirks while rubbing Kyungsoo's cheeks which are still a bit damp from tears. 

Kyungsoo punches him lightly on his abdomen and he replied with a fake "Aww!" scrunching his face as if he's in real pain. 

He stepped closer again to his manager and held both of his hand, staring at him with only sincerity in his eyes. "Tell me, you liked it right?"

Kyungsoo closes the small gap between them, cupping Jongin's cheeks and giving him an open mouthed kiss. He breaks it after a few seconds and brushes the hair strands covering the idol's face, "Thank you Jongin, for everything. I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And it's a wrap!!
> 
> Sorry it took me a long time to finish this one, I hope I gave this idol!au it's justice :( Thank you for staying until the end! Hope you enjoyed this :)
> 
> Also, 2K Entertainment stands for Kai, Kyungsoo. 2K heh, get it? **hides on the corner because i really suck** 
> 
> Anyways, I'm almost done on my next fic because I'm just a bummer like that. Hopefully I could upload it next week. 
> 
> As always, comments are very much appreciated *winks*
> 
> please talk to me on twitter and Curious Cat (CC)  
@jonginniesprout
> 
> P.S i miss kaisoo <33333 :(((((((

**Author's Note:**

> I was planning on writing this one for a long time now and finally, I got the courage to write this. I hope I could give justice to the mini smut I wrote on the early part of this chapter. It's my first time writing that kind of genre and I had so much more to learn. Hopefully I could upload the next chapter next week ^^
> 
> If you're curious about the outfits Kai was wearing, you could ask me on twitter! :) 
> 
> Really appreciate your feedbacks on comment section, it would really encourage me to write even more. Your comment can change life :)) I always reply :) 
> 
> Twitter: @jonginniesprout


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